Grace for All (Part #2)

Two weeks ago, I wrote a blog about Grace: Grace for All and then I read The Ragamuffin Gospel and established new ideas of what Grace means.

Grace Proclaims the Awesome Truth that ALL is Gift
Brennan Manning stated the above and a light bulb appeared over my head.   Everything in our lives is a gift. Everything.  Not just what we THINK is a gift, everything that we have or see or hear or...well, just everything.  Brennan goes on to state:

"While there is much we may have earned - our degree, our salary, our home and garden, and a good night's sleep - all this is possible only because we have been given so much: life itself, eyes to see and hands to touch, a mind to shape ideas, and a heart to beat with love."

Let the Children Come to Me
If we are truly come to God as a child, a child hasn't really "earned" anything yet.  A child is open and honest.  A child is able to love and believe because they have life, not because they have been given a good job or found a life partner.  What about the person with special needs who might not be able to achieve a doctorate degree or a mansion and a yacht?  Are they less of a person?  Not in God's eyes.  He sees the heart - open and knowing.

I have been very blessed to have taught special needs students.  In fact, I have a few this year too.  One young man is in my 6th-8th grade music class at the school.  He has aspergers syndrome and his grandma spoke to me before the first class to let me know.  I had already viewed her grandson in a few social environments and knew he was a spectrum kid.  I believe music is a wonderful way to connect with children with special needs.  I have been making sure to call on this child and allow him to participate to his comfort level.  I got a message this morning via Facebook:

"Just want you to know how much xxxx is enjoying music class.....for the first time in his life, by the way!!!! Thank you Michelle!!"

But the truth is: her grandson is the blessing to me.  It is through children I see God's grace and His love.  

Everyday Mysteries

Brennan Manning writes:

"The gospel of grace calls us to sing of the everyday mystery of intimacy with God instead of always seeking for miracles or visions.  It calls us to sing of the spiritual roots such commonplace experiences as falling in love, telling the truth, raising a child, teaching a class, forgiving each other after we have hurt each other, standing together in the bad weather of life, of surprise and sexuality, and the radiance of existence."

Grace is everywhere and in everything we have.  How often we forget that if we are looking for "mountain top" experiences?  When truly we should be taking in what is right in front of our noses - looking to the current level of our world.  Our world is completely saturated with God's Love and Grace.  We are part of that, but so is EVERYTHING around us.  Why is this so hard to grasp?

I think it is because we cannot even imagine how great His love for us is.  I do think as a parent my understanding of God's love for us (his children) is much greater, but even then I know I am not even able to grasp it completely.  

I will leave you with this passage from Andrew Greeley's "What a Modern Catholic Believes About God":

"Reject Christianity, if you will, out of motives of cynicism; turn away from it because you believe.  Reality is malign and punitive; choose a God that is cantankerous, vindictive, or forgetful, or determined to keep man in his place, if such a God is more to your choosing.  If you cannot accept the idea that love is at the core of the universe, that is your privilege.  If you do not believe that the Absolute passionately wants to be our friend and our lover, then by all means reject such a seemingly absurd notion.  If you do not believe that we have the enthusiasm and the strength and the courage and the creativity to love one another as friends, then quickly cast aside such an incredible idea into the trash can.  And if you think it is ridiculous to believe that life will triumph over death, then don't bother with Christianity, because you can't be a Christian unless you believe that."

In a Post Modern Feminist World

I was born into a home with a mom who did everything.  She sewed our clothing, she baked cookies at least once a week, she made every meal from scratch, and even played with us crazy girls.  My sister and I were 19 months apart, and couldn't be any more different.  I guess you could compare us to my Ladybugs - best friends one minute and worst enemies the next!

I was raised with Christian values, and I had an educationally rich and loving childhood.  Looking back, I had a very wonderful upbringing, of course at the time I felt deprived.  We didn't own an Easy Bake Oven, nor a Slip and Slide; we never drank Koolaid, nor did we get that Starwars AT-AT that was on my wish list.    But what we did have was two parents who lived for us, unselfishly.  I never would have guessed that being a girl wasn't a great thing, even during Sunday School and the like.

I suppose the first time I knew there were double standards was when my male friends, Mike and Joe, were able to stay out later or take the car more often.  My parents claimed it was because, they were boys.  I was disgusted at the time, but my parents also had double standards for my sister and I.  So I came to just accept (though not without groundings) that things were different for me.

I just finished The Dance of the Dissident Daughter, by Sue Monk Kidd, and I must say I was definitely inspired to do some soul searching.  Do I live a life reflective of a predominately patriarchal society?  And worse yet, am I teaching this to my Ladybugs?

Carolyn Heilbrun as written about the "scripts" for womanhood that are handed to women to live out, culturally defined scripts that are written in advance and passed to females from birth.  And historian Gerda Lerner writes that men and women live on a stage, acting out their assigned roles.  They play can't go on without both of them... ~Sue Monk Kidd

If this is true, what "scripts" have my Ladybugs been given?  Do they have any clue they are growing up in a patriarchal society?  I had no clue at their age.  I have always fed their interests, whether that be dressing up or playing with legos.  I think "traditional" female roles are a thing of the past.  These roles began to crumble in my mother's generation; however, my mother felt compelled to take on the role of Mom-Who-Does-Everything.  I'm not so sure that is the right answer either.

Kidd illustrates her journey to The Feminine with different mythological stories and artistic symbolism.  I think one of the most interesting allusions was to the "mother line" illustrated in a Matryoshka doll (Russian nesting doll).  Each layer of the doll represents a mother throughout generations.  For what it is worth, I love Russian nesting dolls and each Ladybug has a set along with a beautifully written and illustrated book.

I am hoping to describe the beauty of the line of matrons in our family.  How interesting it would be if our histories were told by the line of women and not men?

thoughts on One Thousand Gifts

When I originally picked up One Thousand Gifts - A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are last November, I was taken in by a beautiful cover (I am a sucker for a beautiful cover).  After reading the first chapter, I was taken in my the honesty of the writer, Ann Voskamp.  However, I found myself having a very difficult time finishing the book.  I tried on numerous occasions to complete the book, but became swept up in the language to the point of bewilderment.  I was overwhelmed with chapter after chapter of poetic verse.  It was a bit like eating chocolate: completely satisfying at first but a bit nauseating by the fourth piece.

Ann is a writer for Day Spring cards, the company I received a free gift from just a few weeks ago.  Her writing is like reading a bunch of spiritual cards: beautiful, flowery, warm and verbose.  However, for a whole book written like this it was just too much of a good thing.  I also found her writing style to be stream of consciousness.  The narrative was as if we, the reader, were reading her thoughts as she felt them.  And maybe Ann wanted us to experience her journey this way.

I did love a lot of what Ann described as true JOY.  That God is in everything and everyone we meet.  We need to truly give God thanks for everything (the good, the bad, the ugly, and everything in between) to truly understand and receive JOY.  Her idea of eucharisto (thanksgiving) was illustrated by numerous passages in the Bible.  I was very moved by understanding that through thanksgiving to God I would receive JOY.

I still would recommend the book, but to borrow and not buy.  I will continue to look at some of the underlined parts, because I have to admit the book did speak to me.  I was very captivated at times and did find myself fighting through the flowery and quite often fragmented phrases to get down to the elemental point.  Here are some of my favorite thoughts and quotes from the book.  I'm sure some of my devoted readers will notice some former blogs in the following.  There are other thoughts and quotes that would also make great blog topics.  Maybe you'll see a few in the future.

"Just that maybe...maybe you don't want to change the story, because you don't know what a different ending holds." (page 21)


"They say that time is money, but that's not true.  Time is life.  And if I want the fullest life, I need to find to find the fullest time." (page 64)


"We are merely moving shadows, and all our busy rushing ends in nothing" Psalm 39:6 (page 65)


"When did I stop thinking life was dessert?" (page 76)


"It takes your body a full twenty minutes after your stomach is full for your brain to register satiation.  How long does is take your soul to realize that your life is full?" (page 76)


"The parent must always self-parent first, self-preach before child-teach, because who can bring peace unless they've held their own peace?"  (page 124)


"Stress can be an addiction and worry can be our lunge for control and we forget the answer to this moment is always yes because of Christ." (page 160)


"I used to think that God's gifts were on shelves on above the other, and that the taller we grew in Christian character the easier we should reach them.  I find now that God's gifts are on shelves one beneath the other, and that it is not a question of growing taller but of stooping lower, and that we have to go down, always down, to get His best gifts." F.B. Meyer (page 171)


"Though my marriage tree may not bud and though my crop of children may fail and my work produce little yield, though there is no money in the bank on no dream left in the heart, though others may choose different ways to live their one life, till my last heaving breath, I will fight to the death for this: I will take joy" (page 176)

I am still slowly writing my list of thanksgiving.  I haven't even reach 100, which is completely shameful.  I might not list everything I acknowledge each day, but I must admit I am compelled to continue this journey.  There is so much to be thankful for, and I don't want to go back to ignoring the obvious anymore.

My Longest Book Yet

With only 2 weeks left in the year, I was probably biting off a bit more than I should chew when I started Michael Jackson, The Magic, the Madness, the Whole Story last week.

Chiming in at 765 pages, this epic novel was definitely two books in one (or at least I should be able to count it for 2 of my books).  Right?

Anyway, my friend, Colleen, highly recommended it and I must say it was definitely the most amazing story of a person that lived during my lifetime.

I was very into Michael Jackson, probably comparable to the Beiber Fever of today.  I remember going with my parents to the Gibraltar Trade Center to find Michael items.  If I remember correctly, my sister and I left with t-shirts, purses, and buttons with Michael's adorable face front and center.  This was right after Thriller came out, and I had decided that I would marry him one day.  Of course this was after I had made peace with the idea I couldn't marry Jesus, Thomas Edison nor Bing Crosby.

As the book states: "The Whole Story" it was true to that.  The author, J. Randy Taraborrelli, first published the book in 1991, then again in 2003 (with added info), and then finally after Jackson passed in 2009.

The story takes the reader through Michael's younger years, his relationship with Lisa Marie Presley, his alleged child molestation scandals, his three children, and much more.  After all, it is over 700 pages!

I definitely recommend the book, because the author had a great way of captivating the audience into reading more and more.  The life of Michael Jackson reads like a novel, and there are times I had to remind myself this was REAL and not simply a fictitious tale of a recording artist.

Hopefully in the next 2 weeks I am able to finish my goal of 52 books.

Behind the Eyes of the Enemy

On a grey day in 1997, I entered the Tower of London with a bus load of other London tourists.  I was touring by myself, and never felt nervous.  My friend, Dana and her husband were working, and I had no problem following the signs to hop on the bus with other visitors.

However, the minute I entered The Tower grounds I became nauseous.  I assumed it was because I had not eaten lunch yet, and was starving.  But then I became unable to move further - it was almost like my body became paralyzed.  I politely excused myself and remained outside The Tower until the tour bus returned.

I returned home, inspired to read the history of London. I voraciously read history books, novels, memoirs and watched British Tele; I was hooked.   I learned about the vast amounts of people who were put to death on The Tower Square as well as in the walls (i.e. the princes).

In the last few years, I have read many books on the Holocaust.  In both historical times, people were heinously put to death by guards.  I just finished, The Reader by Bernhard Schlink.  Just for the record, I believe Maus was the best book ever written about the Holocaust.

...but, back to The Reader...

I was a bit put off by Part One.  When Michael Berg is fifteen he has hepatitis.  On his way home from school he gets very ill and he is rescued by 36-year-old Hanna Schmiz.  When Michael's health returns, he visits Hanna to thank her for her kindness.  This odd paring turns into a very physical and emotional affair.  Each time Michael visits he is to read to Hanna.  Then they participate in bathing, sexual encounters, and bicycle trips.

I suppose I was creeped out by this, because I am 36 and have male students who look up to me as a teacher.  Having sex with them is pedophilia, and totally creepy!  If it wasn't for my mother insisting I get to Part Two, I would have ended the book then and there.  I am very glad I listened to her, because the story really begins at that point.

Hanna and Michael next meet when she is on trial for a crime, refusing to defend herself.  She was a guard a a concentration camp, and Michael is a law student studying the case.  I don't want to give anything about the story away, but let me state that the ending is a bit disturbing 

On a visit to Struthof in Alsace, the nearest concentration camp, Michael encounters a driver who gives him such poignant and thoughtful incite into one who murdered people in the camps:

"No, I'm not talking about orders and obedience.  An executioner is not under orders.  He is doing his work, he doesn't hate the people he execute, he's not taking revenge on them, he's not killing them because they're in his way or threatening him or attacking him.  They're a matter of such indifference to him that he can kill them as easily as not." page 151

I was deeply affected by this above text.  My best friend, Joe, is currently working in Germany.  He visited a nearby concentration camp and we were texting about his visit.  He made the comment that he couldn't understand who would ever come up with this way of death - and who could carry the heinous crime to fruition.  After reading, The Reader, I wrote him back and told him that he needed to read the book to get a better understanding of one such person.

I do not believe this excuses the crime, but putting ourselves in the shoes of another can be extremely mind blowing.

Did I mention the book is a quick read?! :)  Happy reading to you all!

freedom has a way of destroying things...

I just finished the third book in Scott Westerfeld's Uglies Quartet: Specials.

Each book has given me plenty to think about.  First, Uglies posed the idea of a society obsessed with becoming Pretty.   Then Pretties spoke of how people are simply better without being random - because human nature causes the desire for war and animosity.  Specials went further into the innate human desire for a world controlled by the elite; which interestingly enough used to be run by the rich when the Rusties (basically us) were around.

Yes, us = the Rusties who use metal machines, go to war, and run the world on egos and money.  It really made me think about the world we live in.  Our children are worried about their appearances, the 1% runs everything, and the rest of the world is in limbo waiting to be blown away.

I don't want to go into detail, because that would simply be giving away the plot (and you have to read the series people!).  But throughout these three books, the reader is introduced to the corporate ways of the Cities, the people who live around the Rusty Ruins, others who live as savages in what is uncovered as an experimental community, and finally another City that does things differently than New Pretty Town works.

In the last chapter of Specials, Tally states that "freedom has a way of destroying things."  These words really hit a nerve with me.  I truly believe that our society takes for granted the freedoms we've been given.  We have the ability to worship whomever we choose, we can speak our minds, we can write blogs like this that aren't censored, and we can become whatever our heart desires.  Of course there are consequences.  However, as a mother I hope I am able to instill the freedoms we have been born with here in the United States.

Books that illustrate a dystopic future oftentimes make one think, especially if the future seems plausible.  To me the best ideas are ones that could happen if we continue down the same road we are currently following.  Each journey we take eventually comes to an end - whether positive or negative.  It is up to us to determine which choices are the best at the time.  Hindsight is 20/20, but perseverance to choose the right path for ourselves is what truly matters.  Here's to making choices that in hindsight make us proud and satisfied.

Tween Lit: My New BFF

After my last read, Miss Peregrine's Home For Peculiar Children, I was afraid to return to historical fiction.  So, I went to the library and checked out the second book in the "Uglies" quartet: Pretties, by Scott Westerfeld. 

I read the first book, Uglies, earlier this summer, but became occupied with other reads following.  So I let my hold for Pretties at the library expire.  However, I just couldn't get the story out of my head...and I wanted to know what happened with the characters.  All it took was two days (yeah, I got involved) to complete the book.  And now?  Yeah, I have myself on the library list for the next book: Specials.

The "Uglies" quartet transports the reader to a dystopic future society where physical perfectionism is key.  This idea of a dystopic future is also present in my other favorite author: Shirley Jackson (to whom I own most of her novels and short stories). 

Tally Youngblood is an Ugly obsessively waiting her 16th Birthday, which will bring the much anticipated Pretty operation.  However, just days before her surgery, Tally gets a new roommate: Shay.  Shay does not want to be Pretty and runs away to the Rusty Ruins to find the Smokeys: those who have not had the operation and matured beyond their 16th Birthday as Uglies.  When Tally is picked up for her surgery and sent on a mission from the Specials to retrieve Shay, a journey to knowledge begins.

Pretties starts where Uglies leaves off, and I don't want to give too much away.  Lets just say that Tally is back in the City and she must leave again to regain a more "bubbly" brain and not the "pretty" one that is clouding her thoughts.

These books are not high literature, but captivating all the same.  Scott Westerfeld truly takes you on a suspenseful journey with believable characters and what could happen in our beauty-focused society.  Westerfeld also is very cleaver with how he illustrates situations.  For instance, he never has the characters swear, but rather says, "Tally swore."  It allows his wonderful sci-fi story to be shared with a tween audience, since there isn't worry about adult language or situations (i.e. there is heavy kissing, but no sexual encounters).  Even though there is an absence of language and mature content, I was still sitting on the edge of my seat waiting to see what would come next.

I definitely recommend this book for a tween, teen, and adult audience looking to be swept away for a few days!

I want to be peculiar!

After reading Fairy Tale Mama's Review on Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children, I knew I had to read this book!


I have been reading a whole bunch of duds lately, and honestly, I have not really wanted to blog about them.  However, this gem did not disappoint!


This is a book that would be ruined by too much information...however...


I loved the relationship between Jacob and his grandfather.  His grandfather who is a wonderful storyteller and collector of old pictures of fascinatingly peculiar children.  Jacob spends his young life listening to what he assumes are stories from his grandfather's past. It reminded me of many times I sat down with my own grandfather looking at strange old pictures of his family, and hearing stories of the past.

I was definitely hooked by the first chapter.  It felt all too real to me.  My favorite time period: World War II, a relationship with a grandfather, and strange old photographs.  It was as if this book was written especially for me!  I realize that sounds a bit narcissistic, but I really became engrossed by the plot and was VERY sad the book had to end.

When the book came to a close, I wanted more.  I wanted to be peculiar...I wanted to know these children at the orphanage.  I wanted this tale to be REAL, not just a fictitious story that I simply place on the shelf.  I had to admit, I bought the book.  I have not purchased a book in so long, as the library is my lending friend.  But I HAD to have this book.  I know, it sounds like I'm obsessed...maybe I am, just a little.

One thing I do know: there needs to be a sequel...with or without the smattering of peculiar pictures.  I do think the pictures enhanced the odd tale, but the story had me without the images.  So, Ransom Riggs, if you are out there, PLEASE continue to write about Miss Peregrine and her peculiar children!

Night Road

Not too long in the recent past, I read a wonderful story called, Winter Garden. 

Winter Garden immediately drew me in, and Kristin Hannah's writing style made me laugh and cry.  My mother-in-law suggested I read Winter Garden, and at first I was a bit skeptical because there seems to be a happy ending syndrome to selections from her.  But Winter Garden was different from her usual "you have to read this, Michelle" selection.

I don't want to give away any of the story, but I will tell you I did not see the twists and turns like I usually do with my mother-in-law's selections.  If I start to describe the book I will give too much away.  It was a super quick read for me, and a very cathartic ending.

So, when she brought over Night Road a couple weeks ago I was really excited to read it.  

I don't care if you choose to pick this one up.  Not because it was horrible - I finished reading it.  But because it was nothing like Winter Garden.  Two completely different stories, and it felt like two completely different writers.  Now sometimes, as an author you want to illustrate your ability to convey various styles of writing.  However, in this case, I was constantly saying, "really?"

Night Road is told from two points of view: Jude and Lexi.  Jude is an over-bearing mom with twin high schoolers, Zach and Mia.  Lexi befriends Mia and falls in love with Zach.  Lexi is a product of a foster-care system.  Her mother was a drunk and a drug addict.  Lexi is from the "other side of the tracks" so-to-speak.  The book skips and jumps a few times, and honestly it gave me virtual whip lash.  The book spans 10 years in the lives of these characters, and I realize "stuff" must be cut out.  However, I felt it left the reader disjointed.

The book was quite believable until the tragedy happens.  SPOILER ALERT!!!

Lexi, Mia and Zack go to a senior party and on their way home are in a car accident.  Lexi was driving, but it was Zack's car.  Zack and Mia were completely wasted.  Mia dies.  Jude blames Lexi for killing her daughter.  Zack blames himself.  Lexi goes to prison for 65 months, because she refuses to plea not guilty, and Jude refuses to drop charges.  In prison Lexi finds out she is pregnant with Zack's baby.  She gives her parental rights to Zack, because she refuses the baby girl (which she calls Grace) to have the life she did.  Zack's family is rich, so Lexi believes they will give her baby the "right" kind of life.  Then Lexi gets out of prison after serving a 72 month sentence (she got in fights and such), and sees that her daughter, Grace, isn't happy.  In a lovely turn of events Zack and Lexi reconnect and after 6 years of pain, Jude finally finds peace.

Yeah - the book pretty much sucked.

Go to your ROOM

In two days time (only a few hours actually), I started and completed Room by Emma Donoghue.

This fascinating tale was introduced to me by Fairy Tale Mama. 

I suppose that I found Jack, a 5-year old little boy, a wonderful story teller.  Jack had characteristics that both my girls exhibit: wonder, imagination, inquisitiveness.  I don't think ROOM would have had the same impact if his mother, "ma," narrated the story.

To say too much about this book, I feel I would be giving it away.  I will say this: Jack has never lived outside this 11x11 room, and his ma has been there for 7 years.  Jack was born there, and only knows his ma, himself, and Old Nick (a man that is the bringer of food and Sundaytreats). 

After completing the book, I tried to imagine how everything described in ROOM actually fit into the space.  I must have not been the only one, because there is this lovely little interactive website that lets you see how cramped the ROOM was:

INSIDE THE ROOM

I imagine this book is not for everyone - especially those that cannot see past the odd circumstances of the situation.  There were a few parts that made my stomach lurch, but I suppose that was the intent of the author: I really felt I knew Jack, ma, and ROOM.

I am a bit proud of myself, because my completion of ROOM puts me one schedule for 52 books in 52 weeks!

Fantasy Saga...for real

Okay, so before you start to laugh: yes, I have fallen in love with a fantasy saga!  In April, Game of Thrones begun its reign on HBO.

HBO was my gift to Jim for his Birthday, because he had already read the first four books in the saga (the 5th came out in July) and desperately wanted to see the show.  I was a bit hesitant, because I am not big on the fantasy genre.  However, the first episode had me within the first few moments. 

I must admit, The Song of Ice and Fire, which is the name of the saga Game of Thrones originates, is a FAR cry from my other fantasy experiences: The Lord of the Rings Trilogy (I never made it through any of the movies without falling asleep), The Hobbit (I have tried to read this book 3 times with no avail), Dungeons and Dragons, and Magic the Gathering.

The Game of Thrones is a fictional tale driven by real people; not mystical creatures or strange wizards.  My love of Tudor England probably led to my love of the HBO series, and encouraged me to read the saga.  

I was pleasantly satisfied with the The Game of Thrones.  The HBO show was a wonderful representation of the novel, however, the novel also contained more point of view thoughts and feelings of some of the characters. 

My favorite two characters from the HBO show AND the novel are: Daenerys (a beautiful young princess who becomes the queen) and Tyrion (the imp).  I must say that even though the novel presents Tyrion as grotesque and deformed, I could not stop the image of Peter Dinklage out of my head.  And yes, reader, I have a dwarf crush!  HA!

I am looking forward to the next four books that have been published in the saga, as well as the two that are in the works.

Pack up your troubles...

Just finished a great book: The Faith Club.

Due to a rave review on Enchanted Schoolhouse, I checked out this lovely gem from the library.  It was such a heartwarming and thought provoking story of three moms who come together after 9/11 to write a children's book.  Instead, their meetings created a wonderful opportunity for inter-faith studies.

My favorite theological dialogue came on page 205, when Suzanne (the Christian mom) asked her Priest, "So there is a heaven?"

"Maybe we are in it already," Craig sad.  "Maybe we are living with one foot in this world and one foot in the other, but because we are stuck in our bodies, in this space and time, we can't perceive it.  The key is that our belief in eternal life enables us to live differently today.  Heaven is not a reward for faith.  But rather, our faith allows us to see that we're in God's kingdom already and that we should live according to his wishes."

Interestingly enough I found myself identifying with the Muslim mom, Ranya.  Her spirituality and her desire to find the perfect place to worship are completely in line with my own. 

I call myself a Christian, not because I think I am above the other religions in the world, but because I want to live my life and teach my ladybugs the way Jesus lived his life.  I don't care if Jesus married, I don't buy into the "man-made" trinity, I don't care if Jesus even died for our sins (original at that).  What I do think makes Jesus amazing, is his teachings and how he wanted us to be more like God.  To live with God and the Kingdom here on Earth.

Priscilla, the Jewish mom, recounts a sweet story that her father told her about paper bags.  He told her if everyone put their problems in a paper bag and then thew the bags in a pile.  Which bag would you pull out of the pile?  Would you pull out your own?  Even at his death (a difficult bought of cancer), Priscilla's father said he would still choose his own paper bag. 

This story of a paper bag filled with troubles reminds me of a song I learned in Kindergarten. 

Pack up your troubles in your old kit bag
And smile, smile, smile.
Don't let your joy and laughter hear the snag
Smile boys, that's the style
What's the use of worrying
It never was worth while
So, pack up your troubles in your old kit bag
And smile, smile, smile.

Am I Delusional?

I just finished The God Delusion by Richard Dawkins, due to the book's affect on my dear friend Fairytale Mama.

About 10 years ago I was not happy with my then Lutheran upbringing.  I was in love with my now husband, Jim, and he had heard a great review of The Jesus Mysteries on NPR.  So we bought it, I read it after him, and...well...needless to say I didn't return to church until 6 years ago. The Jesus Mysteries ROCKED my world.  Completely.

It shook the core of my belief system.

However, The God Delusion did not.

I immediately found Dawkins to be self-absorbed and pompous.  He often quotes others that mention his findings and beliefs.  I also was surprised that he stated Thomas Jefferson was an atheist.  He wasn't.  In fact, I own Jefferson's Bible.  Jefferson was a deist.

Okay, back to The God Delusion.  I did "dog-ear" a few pages and did a bit of research.  One of those pages was Dawkins "New Ten Commandments."  I found the list to be very interesting, and very peaceful.  From pages 263-264:

1. Do not do to others what you would not want them to do to you
2. In all things, strive to cause no harm
3. Treat your fellow human beings, your fellow living things, and the world in general with love, honesty, faithfulness and respect.
4. Do not overlook evil or shrink from administering justice, but always be ready to forgive wrongdoing freely admitted and honestly regretted.
5. Live life with a sense of joy and wonder
6. Always seek to be learning something new
7. Test all things; always check your ideas against the facts, and be ready to discard even a cherished belief if it does not conform to them.
8. Never seek to censor or cut yourself off from dissent; always respect the right of others to disagree with you.
9. Form independent opinions on the basis of your own reason and experience; do not allow yourself to be led blindly by others.
10. Question everything

The one "commandment" I most appreciate is: QUESTION EVERYTHING.  Even Dawkins quotes, comments, and ideas.

Another "dog-eared" page was 290, in which a quote from Gary Potter, President of Catholics for Christian Political Action:

"When the Christian majority takes over this country, there will be no satanic churches, no more free distribution of pornography, no more talk of rights for homosexuals. After the Christian majority takes control, pluralism will be seen as immoral and evil and the state will not permit anybody the right to practice evil."

I also found "The Great Beethoven Fallacy" to be rather amusing (pages 298-301).  I really enjoyed how Dawkins illustrated the fallacy of quoted scripture, history, and the like.  It reminded me of when 9-11 happened and there were crazy emails about how Nostradamus predicted the event.  Upon further research the "quote" was taken from two different sections of his work, AND it was misquoted even at that!

Probably the most interesting tidbit in the book was about a "cult" that I had never heard of before: The Exclusive Brethren.

Let me be clear, I wasn't blown away by The God Delusion.  However, I was able to see how it might shake the core of others.

Not a Captive Book

I am utterly disappointed.

I have a few authors that I try to read everything they write: Shirley Jackson, Alison Weir and Phillippa Gregory.  In fact, I also try to obtain a copy of everything they write as well.  I read other authors, as I am a voracious reader.  However, those three woman are my favorite, and therefore, I have a book shelf just for them.

My disappointment is with Alison Weir's novel, The Captive Queen.

Weir is a historian and has written many biographies and biographical books about the monarchy in England and other surrounding nations.  Her books about the Tudor dynasty were the ones that got me hooked on her writing.  However in the last few years, Weir has left her roots of biographical books and taken a fictional look at Jane Grey, Elizabeth, and now: Eleanor of Aquitaine.

I am currently on page 352 of 473 and I really cannot get myself to complete the book.  I really do not have an interest to continue with such sub-par dialogue and a ridiculous queen with an insatiable appetite for sex.  Yes, you "read" me: sex.

There are three types of historical novels: biographical/autobiographical; historical fiction; and historical romance.  When I was younger (i.e. teenager), I loved reading historical romance.  Historical romance is a completely fictional story written during a particular time in history.  Most often there is tons of sex and the plot is pretty simple to follow.  However, I was under the impression that Weir had written a historical fiction book: one that is historically factual about that person but dialogue and situations are fictionalized to keep the book moving.

I am really not interested in Eleanor and her lust after Henry, which made her get an annulment from her first husband, Louis.  The name of the book is: the Captive Queen.  I was more interested in her years as a prisoner of Henry's.  Her time in captivity started in part four, which starts on page 331.  What was that time like for her?  How did she keep her wits?

So I finally get to part four, and the book feels like it is racing with the clock to get past Eleanor's captivity.  I just could not understand why Weir named the book: The Captive Queen, if she was going to focus on the relationship with Eleanor and Henry.  The book should have been named: Eleanor and Henry - a lustful relationship ruined by greed.

My dilemma is that I really wanted to like this book.  I really did.  I enjoyed her first fictional novel attempt: Innocent Traitor, which followed the life and short-lived reign of Lady Jane Grey.  The dialogue did not seem forced, and the plot was intriguing and suspenseful - even if I knew how it ended.  I had high hopes for Captive, and it has not come close.

I feel cheated as a reader and a fan.  I feel like Weir's recent novels are only getting published because of her fantastic success with her historical biographies.  Her latest novel is, The Lady in the Tower.

I received this book as a Christmas gift along with the Eleanor book.  Will I read it?  Yes, I will try.  However, it will NOT be the next book I grab from my pile.  Instead I will read a book that was highly suggested by my husband: The Book of the Dun Cow from Walter Wangerin Jr.

The Book Thief

Even though I had arthroscopic surgery on my left knee this morning (12noon to be specific), I am in the mood to write about a book the I cannot get off my mind (a VERY good review where books are concerned).

The Book Thief, by Markus Zusak, was our church's book club book for the month of February.  The first couple chapters were a bit confusing, but I soon was captivated beyond belief.

I was surprised that The Book Thief is classified as a "Youth" selection.  Not that a middle schooler or high schooler would not find it enjoyable and captivating.  However, I am interested to see how many adults would be compelled to pick it up off a shelf.  It is in NO WAY a book just for youth.

The novel opens with Death narrating the story of Leisel Meminger.  Leisel brushes Death for the first time when her brother dies.  Death took an interest in Leisel, and the novel takes you on a journey through Nazi occupied Germany before, during, and after WWII.

Leisel and her brother (accompanied by their mother) are on a train to live with foster parents (Hans and Rosa Hubermann).  When Leisel loses her brother she is compelled to steal a small book, The Gravedigger's Grave Digging Handbook.  Even though she cannot read, Leisel is fascinated by the written word.

With the help of her foster father, Hans, Leisel learns how to read.

Throughout the novel, Leisel takes other books, is given books from her foster parent and a Jewish house guest (Max), and eventually writes her own story of her life.

Without giving away details nor the ending, I will say that the relationships Leisel makes on Himmel (Heaven) street are crucial to her transforming from a child into a young woman.

The written word becomes a metaphor for Leisel as well as for the Hubermann's house guest, Max.  As one that is in love with words, I was deeply moved by the strong theme: the value of literature.

However, nothing was quite as moving as the two stories that Max gives Leisel: The Standover Man and The Word Shaker.  The crude drawings were just beautiful, and I was touched to be able to read these little treasures.

Here are a couple pages from the book: to give you an idea of what I mean.

For all practical purposes I am going to purchase this book, so that I can reread it again and again.  *****

An Inspiring Young Woman

I just completed what I think is the best works of Anne Frank.

Tales From the Secret Annex had some of the best short stories I have read in a long time.  My favorite, "Eva's Dream," was the subject and content of my last blog post.  Such a beautiful tale and a moral as well.

I posted a status on Facebook last week:
Anne Frank: Amazing child writer, or overrated subjugated child.  Discuss.

The reason I posted this topic of discussion, was because I was curious what others thought of Anne.  She wasn't the only Jewish child that has hidden away during the war, nor was she the only one that wrote a diary.  Here are some of the responses.  Names have been changed to protect the innocent. 

Libby: I will be interested in your responses for this topic as I don't know Anne Frank well (this now inspires me to read Diary of a Young Girl, I've wanted to read that book for some time)

Shawn: I don't think she was an amazing child writer...I think it was the content, realistic descriptions, and horror of what she wrote that makes it so intriguing. I read diary of anne frank at a young age...easy read...therefore not exactly amazing

Manda: For me it's subject matter and reading the point of view of a child during that period in history. I've read quite a few books (fiction, non-fiction, and fiction based on facts) on various aspects of the Holocaust and Anne Frank doesn't stand out as an "amazing writer" to me, perhaps more of an amazing person.

Sassa: Neither. She just kept a diary and it happened to be the one to get published. Fate.

Mi: I understood the value of her book to be the unique 1st hand perspective of an existence/experience that the regime denied happened, not the actual writing style. Accoladed for content not style. I read but didn't particularly enjoy the book when I was young, whereas I've read many essays/reports/other 1st hand summaries of similar situations that did intrigue me. Also part of the 'ooh' factor that gets people is she died. [or did i just make that last part up because i didn't like the book so much?]

Amanda: Historian's point of view: this is what primary sources look like. No different from reading through tax records in terms of style; context makes it poignant but that probably wasn't her intent in writing it! Important to discuss because these days so many people can't deal with 'boring' factual information that hasn't been pre-digested and 'spun' for a good story, hence horrible media literacy in students.

Che (me): I read Anne Frank's diary for the first time this summer, and was instantly captivated at her sincerity and honesty. However, if an adult had written the same diary I do not think we would know her name. Sessa- Her father actually published her diary. It wasn't really fate per say, but a very saddened father (who had money) who lost his daughter. Yes, Mi, she did die in concentration camp. It was a horrible tale, and I read a bit more about that in another book I checked out from the library: http://www.amazon.com/Anne-Frank-words-pictures-archives/dp/159643547X/ref=pd_sim_b_2 During the war people were told to keep diaries. It was assumed that people would want to read these diaries post war, and therefore they would be very popular. Anne loved to write, and actually rewrote her diary to be in book form. I am currently reading her other writings in a book called, "Tales From The Secret Annex." That being said. I think THE best book (graphic novel albeit) about WWII is: Maus.

Lisa: Che, if you are interested in that era. I have about 50 books on the topic, many containing personal diaries and recollections.

Kate: My retired boss had most of his family killed in the camps, he was/is a great mentor. The stories he told about how his parents and 4 uncles lived though the War and then the struggle afterward were always amazing and heart wrenching.

*****************************
To me, the above only verifies that we should know more personal stories about life.  Not just WWII, but all aspects of life.  Understanding where we have been is crucial to know where we are going.

Killing for God

I am currently reading a fascinating book:

A story about Mormon extremists that murder in the name of God.  What is so hard to understand is why a voice in your head is immediately attributed to God/Jesus/or some prophetic informative.  Can people no longer be crazy?

I will write more later on this book, and topic.  This notion of "killing for Jesus" is nothing new.  People have been killing in the name of our Lord for thousands of year.  Out of curiosity I Googled "Killing for Jesus" and got this great set of lyrics from the Circle Jerks.

KILLING FOR JESUS

All across the world
The holy armies on a tear
Ripping through the planet's faiths
Population's running scared
Christianity's all around
Zealots they abound
I wanna blow them to pieces
Cause I...I'm
[Chorus:]
Killing For Jesus
Killing For Jesus

With god on my side
The holy armies gonna ride
Go on a rampage
To rape, plunder and pillage
Insanity's everywhere
Must be something in the air
I wanna blow them to pieces
cause I...I'm
[Chorus]

I'm never bored
When I'm killing for the lord
Now I've seen the light
Hail Mary! I've got Jesus on my side!

Insanity's everywhere
Must be something in the air
I wanna blow them to pieces
cause I...I'm
[Chorus]

He Holds the Future

When storms are raging' round me
And I'm drowning in quicksand,
And unhappy things are happening,
Things that I don't understand,
When I don't know what esle to do,
I'll just do what I can.
Because He who holds the Future
He also holds my hand.

I'll believe that God is with me
Every step of the way.
If He brought me to it
He'll bring me through it,
So in His care I'll stay.
And I will face my future
According to His plan.
He who holds the Future
Also holds my hand.

Claudreen Jackson

Inspired by Austism

I love, love, loved this little memoir by Claudreen Jackson.  She used quotes from other authors that helped her with her son's condition.  Here are my favorite:

"Like a ship that's tossed and driven

and battered by an angry sea

When the storm of life are raging

and the fury falls on me

I wonder just what I have done that makes

my race so hard to run

Then I say to my soul, "Don't worry.

The Lord will make a way somehow."

"Precious Lord, take my hand.

Lead me on, let me stand.

I'm tired, I am weak, I am worn.

Through the storm, through the night

Lead me on to the light

Take my hand, Precious Lord, lead me on.

"God created us and He can constantly and automatically recreate us."

Psalms 23:3 "He restores my soul."

"Don't die with your music still in you."

Anne Frank

I have been deeply moved by Anne Frank this week.  I picked up a new release called, "Anne Frank - her life in words and pictures."  Of course, since I was at the library, I decided to also get a copy of her diary.  Here is my favorite quote from Anne, from Wednesday 23rd, February 1944:

"Riches can all be lost, but that happiness in your own heart can only be veiled, and it will still bring you happiness again, as long as you live.  As long as you can look fearlessly up into the heavens, as long as you know that you are pure within, and that you will still find happiness."

Anne Frank also wrote essays and short stories.  I have added a book of this collection to my Amazon wish list.