Secrets of Family Success - Forgiveness

"You are forgiving and good, O Lord, abounding in love to all who call to you."
~Psalms 86:5

I think Forgiveness is probably the hardest secret to put to fruition.  In logical thinking, to forgive someone seems to be a good idea.  The quicker we forgive, the quicker we can move onward to a healthier and happier life.  Holding onto anger and frustrations only festers inside creating a perfect environment for hate and sin.

I recently read, "The Shack," and was extremely moved by it.  I really want to reread it, due to the fact it contained such powerful ideas and thoughts.  One of the key themes is "forgiveness."

My favorite quote about from the novel is, "'Forgiveness is first for you, the forgiver," answered Papa, "to release you from something that will eat you alive; that will destroy your joy and your ability to love fully and openly.'"

It is really a different way to look at forgiveness.  Forgiveness if for the forgiver, not for the one getting forgiven.  You are forgiving for yourself, a selfish action.  In many ways I think this makes forgiving someone somehow easier.

Of course, logically to forgive someone seems very direct.  However, illogically I must state that I personally don't always forgive as quickly as I should.  I do admit that in the last few years (since I've had the girls), I am a lot more open to forgiving others and moving forward.  It is so much healthier psychologically for me to move forward and not live in the past, or allow a hurt to fester.  I still grieve for the situation (i.e. if a friend hurts my feelings); however, I am able to approach the person and share my perspective.

But I don't forget pain and hurt.  I don't want to relive the past, so I am VERY careful who I surround myself with and what I take on as projects or responsibilities.  I also try to avoid letting others determine how I feel towards something or someone.  Letting go is so cathartic; and emotionally necessary.

I will conclude with another quote from "The Shack".

"Every time you forgive, the universe changes; every time you reach out and touch a heart or a life, the world changes; with every kindness and service, seen or unseen, my purposes are accomplished and nothing will ever be the same again."