Peace - Paix - Shalom
The author describes her daily participation in the Eucharist (which means "great thanksgiving"). She describes the ancient words that are spoken each time the body and blood of Christ are shared in communion. During the celebration, they exchange the kiss of peace ("paix" in French). Holy Communion could be described as a love story. A love story that has knit itself across centuries, across cultures - without barriers. The mystery of how the spirit enters those that participate in the communion; and why this mystery has continued for so long is the question the author asks of us.
When I was younger I always looked at Communion as the special time in the service that my family was able to go to the front of the church and participate in a special meal. I was SO excited to finally get to eat the wafer (hard, round, chewy, flat thing), and the wine (strong and burny). My sister and I used to play communion at home with potato chips and grape juice. When I finally did get to experience communion I was a bit disappointed. What was I missing?
Growing up in a traditional Lutheran church, we went to the altar to receive the "bread" and wine. Those too young would get a blessing. It was a very formal processional that would take place. Once we were back at our seats, my family would pray. I was never quite certain what they prayed for, but it was part of the ceremony. The congregation would experience communion, but not together...each person would experience it next to another, but not with each other.
Until we came to our church, I never really understood the idea of "coming together" or communing. We have real bread that is cut in bite-size pieces. The congregation doesn't proceed to the front of the altar, rather we stay together in our pews. The bread is blessed, and we all eat together. Then the wine/grape juice is passed out, blessed, and consumed together. We never leave our seats, we never have to experience the love story alone. It is what I believe the true sense of "communion" to be. There is no pomp and circumstance, but rather the overwhelming love of experiencing the love story together. What a wonderful feeling to raise up to God in prayer!
Today's scripture
Pslams 139:13-16 (The Message)
Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;
you formed me in my mother's womb.
I think you, High God - you're breathtaking!
Body and soul, I am marvelously made!
I worship in adoration - what a creation!
You know me inside and out,
you know every bone in my body;
You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,
how I was sculpted from nothing into something.
Like an open book, you watched me grow
from conception to birth;
all the stages of my life were spread out
before you,
The days of my life all prepared
before I'd even lived one day.
Monday, August 31, 2009
Sunday, August 30, 2009
pilgrimage - day #15
The author of Pilgrimage brings up a really interesting points on worship in todays reading:
"Is God more fully worshiped if I feel pleasure or satisfaction? Who is at the center of my worship? The worshipers or the One worshiped? Is the worship I offer worthy of God?"
In the last decade I have noticed mega-churches popping up around our area. These churches offer coffee, worship bands, slide-show presentations, and a miriad of other entertaining venues. I say "entertaining" because I feel that churches feel obligated to entertain the new, and very demanding youth/young adult population. The youth (30 and younger) are a generation of people that have always been exposed to computers; they are not just an MTV generation, but a must-have-it-now generation. ADHD has become more prevelant, and our society has made adjustments to every aspect of our lives - even changing the way we worship.
This desire to move towards a more "hip" worship service has, in my opinion, destroyed the simplistic and more traditional worship done in the small churches of yesterday. I have also noticed that churches can either "join them" or stay true to what they believe (i.e. not desiring a service based on entertaining the congregation). In either case, they are limiting the congregation: "join them" offends the older people, and "staying true" might limit the youth/young adults from joining.
Jim, the girls, and I attend a traditional-based church. Yes, it is small; but Jim and I are not comfortable with the new performer/audience idea of worship. There definitely is a skewed perception of "who" is the audience when the church offers such entertainment for the congregation. Who should be the audience? God. But is he in the mega-churches?
I know people that worship in the mega-churches, and in one case I know a praise leader. A praise or worship leader uses a microphone and sings with a worship band (praise band) and with the congregation. Basically he/she takes the congregation through songs and praise for the duration of the service. I have suggested before that he is doing "performances" when he leads worship. He says he isn't performing but worshiping to the Lord. If that were true, it wouldn't matter what his voice sounded like. It wouldn't matter how many times the choir practiced before a performance...ehem, I mean worship service.
Our western culture definitely has opinions on what type of voice is "good" and what type of voice is "bad". Most want to be entertained by a vocalist, so there wouldn't be a "bad" singer leading the congregation in worship...
I just started reading, "This is Your Brain on Music," by Daniel Levitan. He mentions his friend, Jim Ferguson, and his fieldwork in Lesotho. The villagers invited him to sing, which was a HUGE deal. Jim said he didn't sing, and the villagers looked at him and, "found his objection puzzling and inexplicable. The Sotho [villagers] consider singing an ordinary, everyday activity performed by everyone, young and old, men and women, not an activity reserved for a special few." It was as if Jim told the villagers he couldn't walk or dance even though he had both legs!
My favorite part of worship service is when the entire congregation sings to God - together. Yes, it is lovely to listen to others sing His praises, but coming in song together is what I love most about worshiping.
Have we become a society of shallow expectations that we'd rather be pleased than please our Maker? Of course one is attracted to a congregation that feels like family or friends; but is one also attracted to a congregation that creates Sunday morning entertainment? I have been told that the Easter and Christmas concerts at a local mega-church (which houses thousands) is standing room only most of the time. Have we begun to expect our worship to compete with the the likes of Queen or Kiss?
Today's Scripture:
Psalms 95: 1-6 (The Message)
Come let's shout praises to God,
raise the roof for the Rock who saved us!
Let's march into his presence singing praises,
lifting the rafters with our hymns!
And why? Because God is the best,
High King over all the gods.
In one hand he holds deep caves and caverns,
in the other hand grasps the high mountains.
He made Ocean - he owns it!
His hands sculpted Earth!
So come, let us worship: bow before him,
on your knees before God, who made us!
"Is God more fully worshiped if I feel pleasure or satisfaction? Who is at the center of my worship? The worshipers or the One worshiped? Is the worship I offer worthy of God?"
In the last decade I have noticed mega-churches popping up around our area. These churches offer coffee, worship bands, slide-show presentations, and a miriad of other entertaining venues. I say "entertaining" because I feel that churches feel obligated to entertain the new, and very demanding youth/young adult population. The youth (30 and younger) are a generation of people that have always been exposed to computers; they are not just an MTV generation, but a must-have-it-now generation. ADHD has become more prevelant, and our society has made adjustments to every aspect of our lives - even changing the way we worship.
This desire to move towards a more "hip" worship service has, in my opinion, destroyed the simplistic and more traditional worship done in the small churches of yesterday. I have also noticed that churches can either "join them" or stay true to what they believe (i.e. not desiring a service based on entertaining the congregation). In either case, they are limiting the congregation: "join them" offends the older people, and "staying true" might limit the youth/young adults from joining.
Jim, the girls, and I attend a traditional-based church. Yes, it is small; but Jim and I are not comfortable with the new performer/audience idea of worship. There definitely is a skewed perception of "who" is the audience when the church offers such entertainment for the congregation. Who should be the audience? God. But is he in the mega-churches?
I know people that worship in the mega-churches, and in one case I know a praise leader. A praise or worship leader uses a microphone and sings with a worship band (praise band) and with the congregation. Basically he/she takes the congregation through songs and praise for the duration of the service. I have suggested before that he is doing "performances" when he leads worship. He says he isn't performing but worshiping to the Lord. If that were true, it wouldn't matter what his voice sounded like. It wouldn't matter how many times the choir practiced before a performance...ehem, I mean worship service.
Our western culture definitely has opinions on what type of voice is "good" and what type of voice is "bad". Most want to be entertained by a vocalist, so there wouldn't be a "bad" singer leading the congregation in worship...
I just started reading, "This is Your Brain on Music," by Daniel Levitan. He mentions his friend, Jim Ferguson, and his fieldwork in Lesotho. The villagers invited him to sing, which was a HUGE deal. Jim said he didn't sing, and the villagers looked at him and, "found his objection puzzling and inexplicable. The Sotho [villagers] consider singing an ordinary, everyday activity performed by everyone, young and old, men and women, not an activity reserved for a special few." It was as if Jim told the villagers he couldn't walk or dance even though he had both legs!
My favorite part of worship service is when the entire congregation sings to God - together. Yes, it is lovely to listen to others sing His praises, but coming in song together is what I love most about worshiping.
Have we become a society of shallow expectations that we'd rather be pleased than please our Maker? Of course one is attracted to a congregation that feels like family or friends; but is one also attracted to a congregation that creates Sunday morning entertainment? I have been told that the Easter and Christmas concerts at a local mega-church (which houses thousands) is standing room only most of the time. Have we begun to expect our worship to compete with the the likes of Queen or Kiss?
Today's Scripture:
Psalms 95: 1-6 (The Message)
Come let's shout praises to God,
raise the roof for the Rock who saved us!
Let's march into his presence singing praises,
lifting the rafters with our hymns!
And why? Because God is the best,
High King over all the gods.
In one hand he holds deep caves and caverns,
in the other hand grasps the high mountains.
He made Ocean - he owns it!
His hands sculpted Earth!
So come, let us worship: bow before him,
on your knees before God, who made us!
Saturday, August 29, 2009
pilgrimage - day #14
When I hear the word, labyrinth, I'm immediately transported to the 1986 Jim Henson movie. However, upon further investigation, a labyrinth isn't exactly a dark cave/maze full of twists and turns that you have to complete in 13 hours. My recollection of childhood movies is pretty basic, so I don't recall if the labyrinth was really a spiritual journey, but I'm thinking no.
When I searched on pilgrimages of the Middle Ages (as suggested by the Pilgrimage author), I stumbled upon this Awakenings website. I always thought a labyrinth was an underground maze. But I am wrong. A maze is a puzzel, with one way in and another way out. A labyrinth is uni-circular. The way in is the way out. A labyrinth is a way for a person to repent or journey to the "center" of themselves. What a fantastic concept - I love the idea! I believe my spiritual journey is on a path towards the center of myself...the central purpose. As stated before, I'm not on a journey to a physical location, but rather a spiritual location deep within.
In the "Pilgrimage", the author writes about those in her pilgrimage group, "Each pilgrim on this journey is at a different place on the discipleship journey, just as each is at a different place on this labyrinth. Not further ahead or lagging behind, not higher or lower, not faster or slower, just different."
I think there is something to be said about humility. I have noticed myself sharing parts of my journey with those that want to listen. It's not a case of trying to "convert" others to my beliefs, but more that I want others to be a part of my spiritual journey. This journey has been so fascinating, and I want others to know my fulfillment. That is why I am blogging about this. I am doing a daily journal to share with those that I love and care about. I don't believe I'm on this journey alone, rather that I am on a journey and those I encounter are guide posts along the way.
Today's scriptures:
Psalms 10:17-18 (NIV)
You hear, O Lord, the desire of the afflicted;
you encourage them, and you listen to their cry,
defending the fatherless and the oppressed,
in order that man, you is of the earth,
may terify no more.
When I searched on pilgrimages of the Middle Ages (as suggested by the Pilgrimage author), I stumbled upon this Awakenings website. I always thought a labyrinth was an underground maze. But I am wrong. A maze is a puzzel, with one way in and another way out. A labyrinth is uni-circular. The way in is the way out. A labyrinth is a way for a person to repent or journey to the "center" of themselves. What a fantastic concept - I love the idea! I believe my spiritual journey is on a path towards the center of myself...the central purpose. As stated before, I'm not on a journey to a physical location, but rather a spiritual location deep within.
The Chartres Labyrinth
In the "Pilgrimage", the author writes about those in her pilgrimage group, "Each pilgrim on this journey is at a different place on the discipleship journey, just as each is at a different place on this labyrinth. Not further ahead or lagging behind, not higher or lower, not faster or slower, just different."
I think there is something to be said about humility. I have noticed myself sharing parts of my journey with those that want to listen. It's not a case of trying to "convert" others to my beliefs, but more that I want others to be a part of my spiritual journey. This journey has been so fascinating, and I want others to know my fulfillment. That is why I am blogging about this. I am doing a daily journal to share with those that I love and care about. I don't believe I'm on this journey alone, rather that I am on a journey and those I encounter are guide posts along the way.
Today's scriptures:
Psalms 10:17-18 (NIV)
You hear, O Lord, the desire of the afflicted;
you encourage them, and you listen to their cry,
defending the fatherless and the oppressed,
in order that man, you is of the earth,
may terify no more.
Friday, August 28, 2009
pilgrimage - day #13
symbols...
As I start sipping my third cup of coffee this morning, I am juggling plenty of ideas in my head; ranging from spirituality to this unseasonal weather, to Zoe's first day of preschool in less than 2 weeks, and much more. Jim worked late yesterday, and didn't come home until after 11pm. Unfortunately there was no over time for his efforts, but at least he has a job (a steady one) in this unforgiving economic time. However, I stayed up with him and my lack of sleep is definitely knocking me down this morning.
Today the author of "Pilgrimage" speaks about a symbol to mark her pilgrimage. At this point I have determined I'd like to make or receive a rosary. Jim suggested asking his mother (she is Catholic) for a rosary as a Christmas gift. I will probably take him up on this, as I haven't really determined what I need/want this year. So I suppose the rosary could be a symbolic remembrance of this spiritual journey. However, I am not entirely certain at this point if I can chose a symbol of a journey I feel I just started.
I have remembrances of my life. I have collected pictures, books, awards, and other small personal relics of my past. I have two places I store these remembrances - my grandmother's hope chest, and a storage table in my living room that I bought 10 years ago. Thinking about the items I've stored bring back a rush of memories. Whether the memory is a person I've known, or a place I've been they are all warm and inviting. The author suggests remembering the whimsical moments of life. But I don't think all memories I've stored are whimsical in nature. And for me that is okay.
For instance: I want to remember my grandmother's life. I have her ring, and a plant from her funeral. But I also have the prayer card from her funeral, and I kept that to remind me that we are all mortal. Life is precious, and we must embrace every moment we have together in this place. Are there whimsical memories of her life intertwining mine? Of course, but I would say there are deeper memories when I think of her.
I do hope that when the pilgrimage portion of my spiritual journey is completed, I will be able to chose a symbol that brings back warm and inviting memories. I believe it is a bit early to determine what that symbol is.
Today's Scripture:
Pslams 132:14-18 (Message)
This will always be my home;
this is what I want, and I'm here for good.
I'll shower blessings on the pilgrims who come here,
and give supper to those who arrive hungry;
I'll dress my priests in salvation clothes;
the holy people will sing their hearts out!
Oh, I'll make the place radiant for David!
I'll fill it with light for my anointed!
I'll dress his enemies in dirty rags,
but I'll make his crown sparkle with splendor.
As I start sipping my third cup of coffee this morning, I am juggling plenty of ideas in my head; ranging from spirituality to this unseasonal weather, to Zoe's first day of preschool in less than 2 weeks, and much more. Jim worked late yesterday, and didn't come home until after 11pm. Unfortunately there was no over time for his efforts, but at least he has a job (a steady one) in this unforgiving economic time. However, I stayed up with him and my lack of sleep is definitely knocking me down this morning.
Today the author of "Pilgrimage" speaks about a symbol to mark her pilgrimage. At this point I have determined I'd like to make or receive a rosary. Jim suggested asking his mother (she is Catholic) for a rosary as a Christmas gift. I will probably take him up on this, as I haven't really determined what I need/want this year. So I suppose the rosary could be a symbolic remembrance of this spiritual journey. However, I am not entirely certain at this point if I can chose a symbol of a journey I feel I just started.
I have remembrances of my life. I have collected pictures, books, awards, and other small personal relics of my past. I have two places I store these remembrances - my grandmother's hope chest, and a storage table in my living room that I bought 10 years ago. Thinking about the items I've stored bring back a rush of memories. Whether the memory is a person I've known, or a place I've been they are all warm and inviting. The author suggests remembering the whimsical moments of life. But I don't think all memories I've stored are whimsical in nature. And for me that is okay.
For instance: I want to remember my grandmother's life. I have her ring, and a plant from her funeral. But I also have the prayer card from her funeral, and I kept that to remind me that we are all mortal. Life is precious, and we must embrace every moment we have together in this place. Are there whimsical memories of her life intertwining mine? Of course, but I would say there are deeper memories when I think of her.
I do hope that when the pilgrimage portion of my spiritual journey is completed, I will be able to chose a symbol that brings back warm and inviting memories. I believe it is a bit early to determine what that symbol is.
Today's Scripture:
Pslams 132:14-18 (Message)
This will always be my home;
this is what I want, and I'm here for good.
I'll shower blessings on the pilgrims who come here,
and give supper to those who arrive hungry;
I'll dress my priests in salvation clothes;
the holy people will sing their hearts out!
Oh, I'll make the place radiant for David!
I'll fill it with light for my anointed!
I'll dress his enemies in dirty rags,
but I'll make his crown sparkle with splendor.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
pilgrimage - day #12
"The Lord Bless you and keep you;
the Lord make his face shine upon you
and be gracious to you;
the Lord turn his face toward you
and give you peace." (Numbers 6:24-26 NIV)
When I attended the Lutheran church, we always ended the service this way - the benediction. The pastor would speak these words, and it was such a lovely way to end the service. Then he would say, "Go in peace, serve the Lord!" And the congregation would reply, "Thanks be to God!"
When we started attending our current church, we would always sing, "Let there be Peace on Earth." I have always loved that song, and leaving with peace on our minds was so important as we left the conforts of the church walls.
Today's suggestion is to get a blessing for your journey. I'm not looking for a blessing; nor am I looking for permission from others. This journey is personal for me...and even though I don't want to offend anyone, I also don't really care if everyone agrees with my path of enlightenment. Maybe when I get to the end, I will believe it was a disappointment. However, I have already uncovered elements about myself that I didn't already know. So even if I ended the journey today, I would be satisfied with the outcome. However, I am still thirsty for more - so my spiritual journey continues - with or without a blessing.
Another activity suggests making a list of blessing from the last day, week, month or year. Let me just list a few from the last week or so:
*Being told that I have two options to fix the pluming situation in the basement...both require the same services (i.e. tearing up the floor), but one is more money than the other. At least I have an option.
*Getting the Sunday School curriculum finished, teachers volunteered and other church stuff accomplished before Zoe starts preschool.
*Having daily moments to focus on the Bible and my spiritual journey.
*Having great friends that prove again and again their love for me and my family.
*Having two healthy and smart girls. Zoe played a counting syllable game yesterday, and she was so good at it!
*Having a reliable "gutt" that is helping me "weed" out those that drain me of my strength and passion.
Today's Scripture:
Pslams 67:1-7
NIV
(From the director of music. with stringed instruments. A psalm. A song.)
May God be gracious to us, and bless us
and make his face shine upon us,
that your ways may be known on earth,
your salvation among all nations.
May the peoples praise you, O God;
may all the peoples praise you.
May the nations be glad and sing for joy,
for you rule the peoples justly
and guide the nations of the earth.
May the peoples praise you, O God;
may all the peoples praise you.
Then the land will yield its harvest,
and God, our God, will bless us.
God will bless us,
and all the ends of the earth will fear him.
the Lord make his face shine upon you
and be gracious to you;
the Lord turn his face toward you
and give you peace." (Numbers 6:24-26 NIV)
When I attended the Lutheran church, we always ended the service this way - the benediction. The pastor would speak these words, and it was such a lovely way to end the service. Then he would say, "Go in peace, serve the Lord!" And the congregation would reply, "Thanks be to God!"
When we started attending our current church, we would always sing, "Let there be Peace on Earth." I have always loved that song, and leaving with peace on our minds was so important as we left the conforts of the church walls.
Today's suggestion is to get a blessing for your journey. I'm not looking for a blessing; nor am I looking for permission from others. This journey is personal for me...and even though I don't want to offend anyone, I also don't really care if everyone agrees with my path of enlightenment. Maybe when I get to the end, I will believe it was a disappointment. However, I have already uncovered elements about myself that I didn't already know. So even if I ended the journey today, I would be satisfied with the outcome. However, I am still thirsty for more - so my spiritual journey continues - with or without a blessing.
Another activity suggests making a list of blessing from the last day, week, month or year. Let me just list a few from the last week or so:
*Being told that I have two options to fix the pluming situation in the basement...both require the same services (i.e. tearing up the floor), but one is more money than the other. At least I have an option.
*Getting the Sunday School curriculum finished, teachers volunteered and other church stuff accomplished before Zoe starts preschool.
*Having daily moments to focus on the Bible and my spiritual journey.
*Having great friends that prove again and again their love for me and my family.
*Having two healthy and smart girls. Zoe played a counting syllable game yesterday, and she was so good at it!
*Having a reliable "gutt" that is helping me "weed" out those that drain me of my strength and passion.
Today's Scripture:
Pslams 67:1-7
NIV
(From the director of music. with stringed instruments. A psalm. A song.)
May God be gracious to us, and bless us
and make his face shine upon us,
that your ways may be known on earth,
your salvation among all nations.
May the peoples praise you, O God;
may all the peoples praise you.
May the nations be glad and sing for joy,
for you rule the peoples justly
and guide the nations of the earth.
May the peoples praise you, O God;
may all the peoples praise you.
Then the land will yield its harvest,
and God, our God, will bless us.
God will bless us,
and all the ends of the earth will fear him.
pilgrimage - day #8 (explaination)
A few days back I had posted about Zoe and her first "swear word". Since then I have realized I might not have correctly explained one part of the post.
I wrote:
Zoe started crying and said, "But Emma says that word in our house!" I said that other people might use swear words, but that doesn't mean we should.
My first mistake was writing another child's name in my blog. I should have put a "bleep" or something in the place of the name. I have to be more careful, and reread what I write on here. Sometimes I am so preoccupied with other stuff (screaming children, etc.) that I'm not able to read for content or errors in spelling, etc.
My second mistake was not explaining how Emma cannot always control what she says. Saying "stupid" is pretty much a tic for her, and she is put in time out for it. My sister continues to work on this and it is NOT an easy place to be in....it's a huge hurdle and I don't wish it on anyone...which is also a reason I am grateful to her (another pilgrimage blog).
Zoe idolizes Emma in every way, shape and form. I have done my best over the last year to explain why Emma says or does some of the things the says/does. It's not always easy to explain that to a child, considering 99% of the time Emma is VERY smart, kind, and fun to be around.
In no way was I suggesting I am raising Zoe better than my sister is raising Emma. I was suggesting that children will say and do things, but that doesn't mean it is right to say or do those things...even if you idolize that person.
My meaning behind the statement from day #8 was in NO WAY meant as a dis, and I apologize from the bottom of my heart.
I wrote:
Zoe started crying and said, "But Emma says that word in our house!" I said that other people might use swear words, but that doesn't mean we should.
My first mistake was writing another child's name in my blog. I should have put a "bleep" or something in the place of the name. I have to be more careful, and reread what I write on here. Sometimes I am so preoccupied with other stuff (screaming children, etc.) that I'm not able to read for content or errors in spelling, etc.
My second mistake was not explaining how Emma cannot always control what she says. Saying "stupid" is pretty much a tic for her, and she is put in time out for it. My sister continues to work on this and it is NOT an easy place to be in....it's a huge hurdle and I don't wish it on anyone...which is also a reason I am grateful to her (another pilgrimage blog).
Zoe idolizes Emma in every way, shape and form. I have done my best over the last year to explain why Emma says or does some of the things the says/does. It's not always easy to explain that to a child, considering 99% of the time Emma is VERY smart, kind, and fun to be around.
In no way was I suggesting I am raising Zoe better than my sister is raising Emma. I was suggesting that children will say and do things, but that doesn't mean it is right to say or do those things...even if you idolize that person.
My meaning behind the statement from day #8 was in NO WAY meant as a dis, and I apologize from the bottom of my heart.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
pilgrimage - day #11
"The truly wise know that God lives within one's self"
- Pilgrimage, Brown
On day 11, I have experienced the first deep statement along the author's helpful journey.
"While the faithful people of every tradition go on their pilgrimages with devotion and intense fervor, the saintly ones know that unless God is to be found within their own experience, such pilgrimage is useless." - Franciscan Brother Ramon
One phrase I used to laugh at is, "I found Jesus." I thought, where was he hiding? And maybe those that have this epiphany actually "see" Jesus. I would hope that trying to "find" Jesus would include a personal journey into the depths of one's heart and soul. On a deeper level the statement, "Finding Jesus" means something more. Rather than finding him in a physical sense, we should look to be more like him. To find him within ourselves.
Today's Scripture
Psalms 73:25-28
You're all I want in heaven!
You're all I want on earth!
When my skin sags and my bones get brittle,
God is rock-firm and faithful.
Look! Those who left you are falling apart!
Deserters, they'll never be heard from again.
But I'm in the very presence of God -
oh, how refreshing it is!
I've made Lord God my home,
God, I'm telling the world what you do!
- Pilgrimage, Brown
On day 11, I have experienced the first deep statement along the author's helpful journey.
"While the faithful people of every tradition go on their pilgrimages with devotion and intense fervor, the saintly ones know that unless God is to be found within their own experience, such pilgrimage is useless." - Franciscan Brother Ramon
One phrase I used to laugh at is, "I found Jesus." I thought, where was he hiding? And maybe those that have this epiphany actually "see" Jesus. I would hope that trying to "find" Jesus would include a personal journey into the depths of one's heart and soul. On a deeper level the statement, "Finding Jesus" means something more. Rather than finding him in a physical sense, we should look to be more like him. To find him within ourselves.
Today's Scripture
Psalms 73:25-28
You're all I want in heaven!
You're all I want on earth!
When my skin sags and my bones get brittle,
God is rock-firm and faithful.
Look! Those who left you are falling apart!
Deserters, they'll never be heard from again.
But I'm in the very presence of God -
oh, how refreshing it is!
I've made Lord God my home,
God, I'm telling the world what you do!
my relationship with Bonnie #5
Once again I was blessed to share an hour with Bonnie. She brought back Lori, who just returned from Italy. What a wonderful trip she must have had. Lori gave me a bookmark of the Leaning Tower of Pisa. How sweet is that? No, there wasn't anything about Jehovah's Witness written on it - just a pretty bookmark.
I was also invited to attend a meeting in the Kingdom Hall. I was very pleased to be invited. I am considering attending a meeting there one Sunday, because I am very curious what happens. No, I'm not converting, but I believe it is important to view all types of worship - whether that be in a Temple, a church, a Mosque or in a Kingdom Hall. If I have any friends that worship in the above, please invite me to attend. Or at least allow me to understand your faith on a deeper level.
So today we started studying the first chapter in the book, "What Does the Bible Really Teach?" The chapter is titled, "What is the Truth About God?" I was moved by the information which illustrated God is NOT hardhearted, that he is LOVE. One statement was particularly special, "...God is not the source of the wickedness you see in the world around you. Granted, he does allow bad things to happen. But there is a big difference between allowing and causing something to happen."
I have a background of being told: it is God's will. When someone dies, we are told, "God needed them to work in heaven"...or, "God needs another angel." Is this true? Did he make them die? I don't believe so.
In James 1:13 -15 states:
NIV
When tempted, no one should say, "God is tempting me. For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it give birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, give birth to death.
If a parent lets their child leave home and the child pursues a bad way of life, does that mean that the parent is to blame?
Recently I read, "The Shack." If you haven't read that book, you should pick it up. If you haven't read it, you might want to skip the last part of this blog - it gives a bit of the story away.
Mackenzie (Mack - the lead character) is told that God loves all His children. Mack can't believe this, because his daughter Missy was brutally murdered. How could God love the man who murdered Missy? Mack doesn't understand how this is possible.
So he is told to chose two of his five children to go to heaven and the other three to go to hell. Mack became infuriated. He couldn't choose. He ends up offering himself to spend eternity in hell. The following is a quote from the book:
"You have judged them worthy of love, even if it cost you everything. That is how Jesus loves." When he heard the words he thought of his new friend [Jesus] waiting by the lake. "And now you know Papa's [God] heart," she added, "who loves all his children perfectly." p. 163
On page 164 there is another passage that I find heart opening. Mackenzie feels God should have stopped Missy from dying, if he loved her.
"He doesn't stop a lot of things that cause him pain. Your world is severely broken. You demanded your independence, and now you are angry with the one who loved you enough to give it to you. Nothing is as it should be, as Papa desires it to be, and as it will be one day. Right now your world is lost in darkness and chaos, and horrible things happen to those he is especially font of."
Putting a new perspective on the relationship between God and our universe is almost overwhelming. But I believe it to be true. If only I could truly love ALL my neighbors...
I was also invited to attend a meeting in the Kingdom Hall. I was very pleased to be invited. I am considering attending a meeting there one Sunday, because I am very curious what happens. No, I'm not converting, but I believe it is important to view all types of worship - whether that be in a Temple, a church, a Mosque or in a Kingdom Hall. If I have any friends that worship in the above, please invite me to attend. Or at least allow me to understand your faith on a deeper level.
So today we started studying the first chapter in the book, "What Does the Bible Really Teach?" The chapter is titled, "What is the Truth About God?" I was moved by the information which illustrated God is NOT hardhearted, that he is LOVE. One statement was particularly special, "...God is not the source of the wickedness you see in the world around you. Granted, he does allow bad things to happen. But there is a big difference between allowing and causing something to happen."
I have a background of being told: it is God's will. When someone dies, we are told, "God needed them to work in heaven"...or, "God needs another angel." Is this true? Did he make them die? I don't believe so.
In James 1:13 -15 states:
NIV
When tempted, no one should say, "God is tempting me. For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it give birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, give birth to death.
If a parent lets their child leave home and the child pursues a bad way of life, does that mean that the parent is to blame?
Recently I read, "The Shack." If you haven't read that book, you should pick it up. If you haven't read it, you might want to skip the last part of this blog - it gives a bit of the story away.
******************************
Mackenzie (Mack - the lead character) is told that God loves all His children. Mack can't believe this, because his daughter Missy was brutally murdered. How could God love the man who murdered Missy? Mack doesn't understand how this is possible.
So he is told to chose two of his five children to go to heaven and the other three to go to hell. Mack became infuriated. He couldn't choose. He ends up offering himself to spend eternity in hell. The following is a quote from the book:
"You have judged them worthy of love, even if it cost you everything. That is how Jesus loves." When he heard the words he thought of his new friend [Jesus] waiting by the lake. "And now you know Papa's [God] heart," she added, "who loves all his children perfectly." p. 163
On page 164 there is another passage that I find heart opening. Mackenzie feels God should have stopped Missy from dying, if he loved her.
"He doesn't stop a lot of things that cause him pain. Your world is severely broken. You demanded your independence, and now you are angry with the one who loved you enough to give it to you. Nothing is as it should be, as Papa desires it to be, and as it will be one day. Right now your world is lost in darkness and chaos, and horrible things happen to those he is especially font of."
Putting a new perspective on the relationship between God and our universe is almost overwhelming. But I believe it to be true. If only I could truly love ALL my neighbors...
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
pilgrimage - day #10
moments of devotion:
"May I recognize paths that divert me from my true goals and travel only the roads that offer me wisdom, insight, and spiritual growth."
How easy does that sound?! To start a path knowing whether it was the right one would make life so easy. Maybe the statement above refers to leaving a path when it is obviously diverting you from the right path. Of course I've been blinded by paths MANY times in my life, so I'm not sure I always see the correct course even half-way down the diverted path. I also believe sometimes we need to deviate from the path...making the journey more interesting.
There is a poem by Robert Frost that I absolutely love.
The Road Not Taken
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
So I'd rather take the path that weaves in and out. I think it helps to determine the journey is on the right road. If you didn't know the wrong roads or allowed yourself time to deviate on the journey; how could you know for certain you were on the right path?
The author talks about "passing fashions of the religious times." I find this phrase hilarious. I have searched for years, wandering and wondering where I was supposed to land. I am the type of person always looking for the "what is next" project. However, since I have been studying the Bible I have been less project oriented and more people oriented. I am looking at a bigger picture and less concerned with daily activities and road blocks that can stop me from moving forward. All of this has helped with my anxieties and feelings of being out of control. Knowing that I only have so much control is easy to understand. Of course relinquishing the desire to try to be in complete control is not possible at this point. However, I am enjoying the process a lot more than I was previously.
I am proud to be taking the road less traveled, are you?
Today's scripture
Psalms 141:1-4 (The Message)
God, come close. Come quickly!
Open your ears - it's my voice you're hearing!
Treat my prayer as sweet incense rising;
my raised hands are my evening prayers.
Post a guard at my mouth, God,
set a watch at the door of my lips.
Don't let me so much dream of evil
or thoughtlessly fall into bad company.
And these people who only do wrong -
don't let them lure me with their sweet talk!
"May I recognize paths that divert me from my true goals and travel only the roads that offer me wisdom, insight, and spiritual growth."
How easy does that sound?! To start a path knowing whether it was the right one would make life so easy. Maybe the statement above refers to leaving a path when it is obviously diverting you from the right path. Of course I've been blinded by paths MANY times in my life, so I'm not sure I always see the correct course even half-way down the diverted path. I also believe sometimes we need to deviate from the path...making the journey more interesting.
There is a poem by Robert Frost that I absolutely love.
The Road Not Taken
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
So I'd rather take the path that weaves in and out. I think it helps to determine the journey is on the right road. If you didn't know the wrong roads or allowed yourself time to deviate on the journey; how could you know for certain you were on the right path?
The author talks about "passing fashions of the religious times." I find this phrase hilarious. I have searched for years, wandering and wondering where I was supposed to land. I am the type of person always looking for the "what is next" project. However, since I have been studying the Bible I have been less project oriented and more people oriented. I am looking at a bigger picture and less concerned with daily activities and road blocks that can stop me from moving forward. All of this has helped with my anxieties and feelings of being out of control. Knowing that I only have so much control is easy to understand. Of course relinquishing the desire to try to be in complete control is not possible at this point. However, I am enjoying the process a lot more than I was previously.
I am proud to be taking the road less traveled, are you?
Today's scripture
Psalms 141:1-4 (The Message)
God, come close. Come quickly!
Open your ears - it's my voice you're hearing!
Treat my prayer as sweet incense rising;
my raised hands are my evening prayers.
Post a guard at my mouth, God,
set a watch at the door of my lips.
Don't let me so much dream of evil
or thoughtlessly fall into bad company.
And these people who only do wrong -
don't let them lure me with their sweet talk!
Monday, August 24, 2009
pilgrimage - day #9
Yesterday there was a hymn sing at my church. However, it was also my grandpa's Birthday party, so I wasn't able to attend the singing and fellowship. I was a bit bummed, because I love to sing hymns. There is such a warmth and community when singing together songs that you've known for years.
Today's Pilgrimage topic is: Because I Am. When I first read it, I was reminded of one of my VERY favorite hymns.
Just as I Am
Just as I am, without one plea,
but that thy blood was shed for me,
and that thou bidst me come to thee,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, and waiting not
to rid my soul of one dark blot,
to thee whose blood can cleanse each spot,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, though tossed about
with many a conflict, many a doubt,
fightings and fears within, without,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, poor, wretched, blind;
sight, riches, healing of the mind,
yea, all I need in thee to find,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, thou wilt receive,
wilt welcome, pardon, cleanse, relieve;
because thy promise I believe,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, thy love unknown
hath broken every barrier down;
now, to be thine, yea thine alone,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
There seems to be such an honest albeit quiet acclimation in this hymn. I also love a more contemporary version based on the same concept.
Here I am Lord
Today's devotion suggests thinking about times when I have experienced child-like wonder. I suppose I experience it every day, through my girls. There is always something new for them to explore - and because of them I continue to strive to be closer to God.
Today's Scripture
Pslams 9:1-2
I'm thanking you, God, from a full heart,
I'm writing the book on your wonders.
I'm whistling, laughing, and jumping for joy;
I'm singing your song, High God.
Today's Pilgrimage topic is: Because I Am. When I first read it, I was reminded of one of my VERY favorite hymns.
Just as I Am
Just as I am, without one plea,
but that thy blood was shed for me,
and that thou bidst me come to thee,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, and waiting not
to rid my soul of one dark blot,
to thee whose blood can cleanse each spot,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, though tossed about
with many a conflict, many a doubt,
fightings and fears within, without,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, poor, wretched, blind;
sight, riches, healing of the mind,
yea, all I need in thee to find,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, thou wilt receive,
wilt welcome, pardon, cleanse, relieve;
because thy promise I believe,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, thy love unknown
hath broken every barrier down;
now, to be thine, yea thine alone,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
There seems to be such an honest albeit quiet acclimation in this hymn. I also love a more contemporary version based on the same concept.
Here I am Lord
Today's devotion suggests thinking about times when I have experienced child-like wonder. I suppose I experience it every day, through my girls. There is always something new for them to explore - and because of them I continue to strive to be closer to God.
Today's Scripture
Pslams 9:1-2
I'm thanking you, God, from a full heart,
I'm writing the book on your wonders.
I'm whistling, laughing, and jumping for joy;
I'm singing your song, High God.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
pilgrimage - day #8
"As shoes for your feet put on whatever will make you ready to proclaim the gospel of peace"
Ephesians 6:15
The children's sermon today was very moving. Our pastor brought 4 different kinds of shoes: slippers, dress pumps, work flats, and sandals. She asked the children what kinds of activities each shoe suggested. It was very cute the variety of answers the children gave. Then she asked which pair of shoes would be best suited to proclaim the gospel of peace.
Zoe and her friend, Natalie, both enthusiastically suggested the dress pumps, since they were perfect for dancing or a wedding. But the rest of the kids didn't answer, mostly because they were playing with the shoes in front of them.
The answer was simple, yet profound: all of the above. No matter where we are (church, work, home, dancing, camping, playing, etc.) we should always proclaim the gospel of peace.
As I embark on week 2 of this pilgrimage, I am reminded that I am on a journey to be closer to Him; therefore I need to live the peace I want to proclaim and share with others. Living my life and treating all situations as if God is a constant observer...because he is.
Yesterday, Zoe said her first swear word: stupid. She said she was "done with her stupid lunch." It was in response to my telling her she had to be done with lunch before she helped me bake Papa Ray's Birthday cake. I immediately said, "what did you say?" To which she repeated "stupid" numerous times. I then explained to her that she needed to stop saying that word, or she would go to time out. Then I proceded to tell her that it is a swear word, and words like that hurt God's ears. We don't want to hurt God's ears, so we have to be careful to say things that are pleasing for Him to hear. I told her that other people say such words, but that in our house we say and sing words that are pleasing to God.
Zoe started crying and said, "But Emma says that word in our house!" I said that other people might use swear words, but that doesn't mean we should.
I have spent the week cognizant of my "swear words". Trying diligently to stop myself from saying anything offensive - even spelling it. It is such a hard thing for me to do, because I have allowed swearing to be part of my nature. I don't swear in front of students or my children, but I let my "guard" down in the comforts of adults friends and/or loved ones. I must continue to work on my language to live out the actions of what I spoke to Zoe: saying or singing words that pleases God's ears.
Today's Scripture
Psalms 17:5-6 (NIV)
My steps have held to your paths;
my feet have not slipped.
I call on you, O God, for you will answer me;
give ear to me and hear my prayer.
Ephesians 6:15
The children's sermon today was very moving. Our pastor brought 4 different kinds of shoes: slippers, dress pumps, work flats, and sandals. She asked the children what kinds of activities each shoe suggested. It was very cute the variety of answers the children gave. Then she asked which pair of shoes would be best suited to proclaim the gospel of peace.
Zoe and her friend, Natalie, both enthusiastically suggested the dress pumps, since they were perfect for dancing or a wedding. But the rest of the kids didn't answer, mostly because they were playing with the shoes in front of them.
The answer was simple, yet profound: all of the above. No matter where we are (church, work, home, dancing, camping, playing, etc.) we should always proclaim the gospel of peace.
As I embark on week 2 of this pilgrimage, I am reminded that I am on a journey to be closer to Him; therefore I need to live the peace I want to proclaim and share with others. Living my life and treating all situations as if God is a constant observer...because he is.
Yesterday, Zoe said her first swear word: stupid. She said she was "done with her stupid lunch." It was in response to my telling her she had to be done with lunch before she helped me bake Papa Ray's Birthday cake. I immediately said, "what did you say?" To which she repeated "stupid" numerous times. I then explained to her that she needed to stop saying that word, or she would go to time out. Then I proceded to tell her that it is a swear word, and words like that hurt God's ears. We don't want to hurt God's ears, so we have to be careful to say things that are pleasing for Him to hear. I told her that other people say such words, but that in our house we say and sing words that are pleasing to God.
Zoe started crying and said, "But Emma says that word in our house!" I said that other people might use swear words, but that doesn't mean we should.
I have spent the week cognizant of my "swear words". Trying diligently to stop myself from saying anything offensive - even spelling it. It is such a hard thing for me to do, because I have allowed swearing to be part of my nature. I don't swear in front of students or my children, but I let my "guard" down in the comforts of adults friends and/or loved ones. I must continue to work on my language to live out the actions of what I spoke to Zoe: saying or singing words that pleases God's ears.
Today's Scripture
Psalms 17:5-6 (NIV)
My steps have held to your paths;
my feet have not slipped.
I call on you, O God, for you will answer me;
give ear to me and hear my prayer.
Saturday, August 22, 2009
pilgrimage - day #7
Upon this day 7 of the pilgrimage, I find humor (or humour) in the author's moment of devotion today. She misspelled "others", as "othrs." Yes, the ex-quality tester is still alive and well inside me - always looking for a way to escape.
I find it amusing every time I stumble across a misspelling. You'd think it wouldn't happen so often, but it does. I've been known to write (email lately) the author (authors) to let them know of their mistake or inconsistency.
A few years back, I recieved a book about Dearborn for Christmas. It is called, "Dearborn, Michigan Images of America." I enjoyed it - as I love looking at old photographs of areas, especially those I've lived or visited. However, there were two errors. One was a wrong date, and the other was a misspelling. I found one of the author's information on the Dearborn Historical Society website, and decided to write him an email.
Mr. Hutchison was very kind. He knew about the date - an oversite that was found after publication by him. However, the misspelling was not something he found. He was appreciative in the response, but I wonder if he REALLY was thankful for the constructive critisism.
Today's reading was about stumbling along the path. Wanting to lay down your staff and quit.
I have definitely felt that way - in fact, some of my hardest challenges have been those I've left before fruition. I left a marriage before a year was done, I left a business before the economy played out, and I have quit a job and not had one to move into. All of these events were very difficult, and played a huge role in my life. But in all cases I listened to my heart - that feeling inside that tells you what to do. Instinct, sixth-sense, etc.
I think there is a point where you must lay down your staff and move down a different path. Leaving someone or something behind can be traumatic; but I cannot imagine my life any different.
Today's scripture
Psalms 37:23-24 (NIV)
If the Lord delights in a man's way,
he makes his steps firm;
though he stummble, he will not fall,
for the Lord upholds him with his hand.
(The Message)
Stalwart walks in step with God;
his path blazed by God, he's happy.
If he stumbles, he's not down for long;
God has a grip on his hand.
I find it amusing every time I stumble across a misspelling. You'd think it wouldn't happen so often, but it does. I've been known to write (email lately) the author (authors) to let them know of their mistake or inconsistency.
A few years back, I recieved a book about Dearborn for Christmas. It is called, "Dearborn, Michigan Images of America." I enjoyed it - as I love looking at old photographs of areas, especially those I've lived or visited. However, there were two errors. One was a wrong date, and the other was a misspelling. I found one of the author's information on the Dearborn Historical Society website, and decided to write him an email.
Mr. Hutchison was very kind. He knew about the date - an oversite that was found after publication by him. However, the misspelling was not something he found. He was appreciative in the response, but I wonder if he REALLY was thankful for the constructive critisism.
Today's reading was about stumbling along the path. Wanting to lay down your staff and quit.
I have definitely felt that way - in fact, some of my hardest challenges have been those I've left before fruition. I left a marriage before a year was done, I left a business before the economy played out, and I have quit a job and not had one to move into. All of these events were very difficult, and played a huge role in my life. But in all cases I listened to my heart - that feeling inside that tells you what to do. Instinct, sixth-sense, etc.
I think there is a point where you must lay down your staff and move down a different path. Leaving someone or something behind can be traumatic; but I cannot imagine my life any different.
Today's scripture
Psalms 37:23-24 (NIV)
If the Lord delights in a man's way,
he makes his steps firm;
though he stummble, he will not fall,
for the Lord upholds him with his hand.
(The Message)
Stalwart walks in step with God;
his path blazed by God, he's happy.
If he stumbles, he's not down for long;
God has a grip on his hand.
Friday, August 21, 2009
comment from Dorotea Pettersson
I've tried to leave a comment on your blog but it doesn't work. I liked what you wrote about Jewish literature. Being a person with a lot of knowledge in Jewish culture and especially the war it makes me happy when people want to read about it.
I spend a lot of time translating what my grandfather (on my dads side) wrote about the war. What he and my grandmother lived trough during that time. It's 800 pages in Polish so it will take me a lifetime but it is such an important legacy that I have to do it. I want my children to know where we come from and what happened to our family.
Right now I'm mostly working with the letters that they wrote to each other after the war when they understood that they were both alive. My grandfather was in Russia and my grandmother sat in the Warsaw ghetto until she was shipped to a concentration camp. I have never read anything so beautiful in my life. It's filled with life from two people that felt dead.
What people don't understand is that we that are Jewish never forget the war even if we didn't live it. It's part of us. It's in our genes. We are reminded all the time about it. My dad still doesn't tell people he´s Jewish cause it was not done when he was a kid. It was dangerous and he still thinks it is and gets mad at me for wanting to publish my grandfathers "book".
It seems like the book that you are using for your Bible study is a good one. And I like what you write about how you choose who you want to spend time with and especially for your girls. I am the same. I am strict and I know how I want my daughter to grow up. It's a little hard since her dad does not share my views but I believe that if I keep going she will learn. My husband thinks the same as me so that feels good. I think having God in mind when we take care of our children makes us more aware of how we want them to become.
Sorry for writing such a long note but reading what you write makes me think. And it feels nice to know that there are other people that see things similar to me.
Keep writing. love, dorro
I spend a lot of time translating what my grandfather (on my dads side) wrote about the war. What he and my grandmother lived trough during that time. It's 800 pages in Polish so it will take me a lifetime but it is such an important legacy that I have to do it. I want my children to know where we come from and what happened to our family.
Right now I'm mostly working with the letters that they wrote to each other after the war when they understood that they were both alive. My grandfather was in Russia and my grandmother sat in the Warsaw ghetto until she was shipped to a concentration camp. I have never read anything so beautiful in my life. It's filled with life from two people that felt dead.
What people don't understand is that we that are Jewish never forget the war even if we didn't live it. It's part of us. It's in our genes. We are reminded all the time about it. My dad still doesn't tell people he´s Jewish cause it was not done when he was a kid. It was dangerous and he still thinks it is and gets mad at me for wanting to publish my grandfathers "book".
It seems like the book that you are using for your Bible study is a good one. And I like what you write about how you choose who you want to spend time with and especially for your girls. I am the same. I am strict and I know how I want my daughter to grow up. It's a little hard since her dad does not share my views but I believe that if I keep going she will learn. My husband thinks the same as me so that feels good. I think having God in mind when we take care of our children makes us more aware of how we want them to become.
Sorry for writing such a long note but reading what you write makes me think. And it feels nice to know that there are other people that see things similar to me.
Keep writing. love, dorro
pilgrimage - day #6
"stuff"
I will never forget I had a teacher in elementary school that hated that word. When used as a noun, it can take the place of "things" or a list of items. So the teacher would mark us down for using the word "stuff" or "things" in our writing. I actually became offended by the word. I truly don't like reading it as a noun (stuff can be a verb too - I want to stuff this sock inside your mouth).
Now as a teacher I find myself loathing the word. I always ask my students, "What is new?" or "What did you do this week." Quite often I get the answer, "stuff." I always follow up with, "What kind of stuff?" And believe it or not I get the answer, "...well, you know...stuff..." more than not.
So through the years I have looked at extra items in my "inventory" as "stuff." Allowing the negative connotation to be just that: STUFF that I need to rid myself of.
The activity today suggests making a list of "stuff" that can be eliminated from your life. The idea is letting go of the greed and excess that can be distracting from the journey at hand.
I am pretty good about organization and maintaining a "stuff" free environment. I do this because of my problems with anxiety. I can become overwhelmed or anxious when I'm in a disorganized environment. I often find myself organizing and reorganizing until the space is pleasing. So to make a list of "stuff," I am compelled to look at situations and/or people that need to be eliminated from my life.
I am the kind of person that doesn't regret much in life. I don't spend a ton of time making decisions that would be considered "daily" in nature (i.e. what to eat for dinner, what to wear, etc.). In fact, I don't spend a ton of time on bigger decisions either. I follow my heart (gut whatever you want to call it). I try to listen to my inner voice for an answer. Sometimes that gets me in trouble, or I might get hurt. But I'd rather experience something than have a regret later that I didn't experience something.
My criteria for friendships is much different than before I had children. Now I do my best to surround my children with "like-minded" people. I am careful to befriend a person that treats me the way I deserve to be treated. Basically treats me the way I treat them. I have also noticed that I have pulled myself away from friendships that are one-sided or emotionally draining. I don't create a dramatic "break-up," rather I just don't give as much time to that relationship as I used to. Friendship doesn't necessarily need daily attention, but you do need to remain focused on the relationship. Yes, I said relationship.
Becoming a Facebook person has put me in contact with people I haven't spoken to for years (some for 20 or more). It's always interesting to reconnect with those whom I was quite close to growing up. Part of me wonders why the relationship didn't continue, but once I reconnect with the person it's pretty obvious. I also find it really interesting that some people that I knew growing up have so much in common with me now. We weren't "enemies" back in the day; just not close. These are the relationships I'm surprised and elated by.
I also must admit that we all grow as people. Sometimes relationships don't grow with us. There is such a lovely poem that gets attached to emails ever so often. I will share it now.
Today's reading
Psalms 73:1-5, 21-24 (The Message)
No doubt about it! God is good -
good to good people, good to the good hearted.
But I nearly missed it,
missed seeing his goodness.
I was looking the other way,
looking up to the people
At the top,
envying the wicked who have it made,
Who have nothing to worry about,
not a care in the whole wide world.
When I was beleaguered and bitter, (beleaguered means to be surrounded by problems)
totally consumed by envy,
I was totally ignorant, a dumb ox
in your very presence.
I'm still in your presence,
but you've taken my hand.
You wisely and tenderly lead me,
and then you bless me.
I will never forget I had a teacher in elementary school that hated that word. When used as a noun, it can take the place of "things" or a list of items. So the teacher would mark us down for using the word "stuff" or "things" in our writing. I actually became offended by the word. I truly don't like reading it as a noun (stuff can be a verb too - I want to stuff this sock inside your mouth).
Now as a teacher I find myself loathing the word. I always ask my students, "What is new?" or "What did you do this week." Quite often I get the answer, "stuff." I always follow up with, "What kind of stuff?" And believe it or not I get the answer, "...well, you know...stuff..." more than not.
So through the years I have looked at extra items in my "inventory" as "stuff." Allowing the negative connotation to be just that: STUFF that I need to rid myself of.
The activity today suggests making a list of "stuff" that can be eliminated from your life. The idea is letting go of the greed and excess that can be distracting from the journey at hand.
I am pretty good about organization and maintaining a "stuff" free environment. I do this because of my problems with anxiety. I can become overwhelmed or anxious when I'm in a disorganized environment. I often find myself organizing and reorganizing until the space is pleasing. So to make a list of "stuff," I am compelled to look at situations and/or people that need to be eliminated from my life.
I am the kind of person that doesn't regret much in life. I don't spend a ton of time making decisions that would be considered "daily" in nature (i.e. what to eat for dinner, what to wear, etc.). In fact, I don't spend a ton of time on bigger decisions either. I follow my heart (gut whatever you want to call it). I try to listen to my inner voice for an answer. Sometimes that gets me in trouble, or I might get hurt. But I'd rather experience something than have a regret later that I didn't experience something.
My criteria for friendships is much different than before I had children. Now I do my best to surround my children with "like-minded" people. I am careful to befriend a person that treats me the way I deserve to be treated. Basically treats me the way I treat them. I have also noticed that I have pulled myself away from friendships that are one-sided or emotionally draining. I don't create a dramatic "break-up," rather I just don't give as much time to that relationship as I used to. Friendship doesn't necessarily need daily attention, but you do need to remain focused on the relationship. Yes, I said relationship.
Becoming a Facebook person has put me in contact with people I haven't spoken to for years (some for 20 or more). It's always interesting to reconnect with those whom I was quite close to growing up. Part of me wonders why the relationship didn't continue, but once I reconnect with the person it's pretty obvious. I also find it really interesting that some people that I knew growing up have so much in common with me now. We weren't "enemies" back in the day; just not close. These are the relationships I'm surprised and elated by.
I also must admit that we all grow as people. Sometimes relationships don't grow with us. There is such a lovely poem that gets attached to emails ever so often. I will share it now.
People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you figure out which one it is, you will know what to do for each person.
When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are! They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part, or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered. And now it is time to move on.
Then people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They bring you an experience of peace, or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons: things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
Today's reading
Psalms 73:1-5, 21-24 (The Message)
No doubt about it! God is good -
good to good people, good to the good hearted.
But I nearly missed it,
missed seeing his goodness.
I was looking the other way,
looking up to the people
At the top,
envying the wicked who have it made,
Who have nothing to worry about,
not a care in the whole wide world.
When I was beleaguered and bitter, (beleaguered means to be surrounded by problems)
totally consumed by envy,
I was totally ignorant, a dumb ox
in your very presence.
I'm still in your presence,
but you've taken my hand.
You wisely and tenderly lead me,
and then you bless me.
Thursday, August 20, 2009
pilgrimage - day #5
I was a bit concerned when I read the title for today's Bible study: Early Martyred Saints. Yes, as a non-Catholic person I grew up thinking the idea of praying to a saint was ludicrous. I couldn't understand why a person buried a statue of St. Joseph in the ground (upside down to boot). Such ridiculous superstition infiltrating intelligent people's lives. Why pray to a saint when you could pray directly to the "big man on campus" (i.e. God).
This was until my grandmother passed on over 7 years ago. Since her passing, I find myself "talking" to her when I need advice. Mostly when I'm cooking or baking and I find myself in a sticky situation. But I find such comfort "talking" with her that I can understand the comfort in praying (or talking) to a saint.
One of the activities for today is to name 10 people whom I am grateful for in my life. The activity only said to name the people, but I thought I'd state a short reason why. Some of the answers may surprise you, and some may not. I almost didn't create the list, because I didn't want to hurt people's feelings. I also made the stipulation: the list must contain people that I know or have known (no Hollywood persona or music people). And I must state that this list wasn't that easy to write. I contemplated over a lot of people in my life. However, I feel that grateful and thankful are different adjectives. I am thankful for many people and things in my life - every day there are many things to be thankful for. But I believe that grateful is a deeper emotion; almost on an elemental level. Without further ado here is the list in no particular order:
Jim - for his outstanding ability to have faith in me and our marriage and parental partnership (albeit a bit unorthodox at times); he always allows for personal and relationship growth and possibility.
Zoe - for her unending questions about how the universe works and our place in it; she daily challenges my brain and that is a fantastic quality about a child.
Eva - for her fascinating exuberance and overwhelming love for everything and everyone in the world.
Dana - for her unending support in EVERYTHING I do and defining what FRIENDSHIP truly is.
Ray - my grandpa and Pal who at 91 is younger in spirit than many 30-somethings that I know.
Mrs. Weber - her facets (and faults) as a piano teacher shaped and continues to shape the choices I make as a teacher and musician.
Tom - my father, my music mentor, and quite possibly my biggest fan (albeit the quietest); his band, "The Knight Kats" were very influential to the music I listen to and write.
Cheryl - my mother and the quintessential "Super Mom" to whom I try to strive daily to become.
Amanda L.- she epitomizes what it means to be a remarkable person; her heart was open to an unorthodox friendship and that means so much to me
Kelly - my sister and a woman that lives the change she wants to see in the world. Not many people can claim that.
Today's scripture
Pslams 88:1-8 (The Message)
God you're my last chance of the day.
I spend the night on my knees before you.
Put me on your salvation agenda;
take notes on the trouble I'm in.
I've had my fill of trouble;
I'm camped on the edge of hell.
I'm written off as a lost cause,
one more statistic, a hopeless case.
Abandoned as already dead,
one more body in a stack of corpses,
And not so much as a gravestone -
I'm a black hole in oblivion.
You've dropped me into a bottomless pit,
sunk me in a pitch-black abyss.
I'm battered senseless by your rage,
relentlessly pounded by your waves of anger.
You turned my friends against me,
made me horrible to them.
I'm caught in a maze and can't find my way out,
blinded by tears of pain and frustration.
This was until my grandmother passed on over 7 years ago. Since her passing, I find myself "talking" to her when I need advice. Mostly when I'm cooking or baking and I find myself in a sticky situation. But I find such comfort "talking" with her that I can understand the comfort in praying (or talking) to a saint.
One of the activities for today is to name 10 people whom I am grateful for in my life. The activity only said to name the people, but I thought I'd state a short reason why. Some of the answers may surprise you, and some may not. I almost didn't create the list, because I didn't want to hurt people's feelings. I also made the stipulation: the list must contain people that I know or have known (no Hollywood persona or music people). And I must state that this list wasn't that easy to write. I contemplated over a lot of people in my life. However, I feel that grateful and thankful are different adjectives. I am thankful for many people and things in my life - every day there are many things to be thankful for. But I believe that grateful is a deeper emotion; almost on an elemental level. Without further ado here is the list in no particular order:
Jim - for his outstanding ability to have faith in me and our marriage and parental partnership (albeit a bit unorthodox at times); he always allows for personal and relationship growth and possibility.
Zoe - for her unending questions about how the universe works and our place in it; she daily challenges my brain and that is a fantastic quality about a child.
Eva - for her fascinating exuberance and overwhelming love for everything and everyone in the world.
Dana - for her unending support in EVERYTHING I do and defining what FRIENDSHIP truly is.
Ray - my grandpa and Pal who at 91 is younger in spirit than many 30-somethings that I know.
Mrs. Weber - her facets (and faults) as a piano teacher shaped and continues to shape the choices I make as a teacher and musician.
Tom - my father, my music mentor, and quite possibly my biggest fan (albeit the quietest); his band, "The Knight Kats" were very influential to the music I listen to and write.
Cheryl - my mother and the quintessential "Super Mom" to whom I try to strive daily to become.
Amanda L.- she epitomizes what it means to be a remarkable person; her heart was open to an unorthodox friendship and that means so much to me
Kelly - my sister and a woman that lives the change she wants to see in the world. Not many people can claim that.
Today's scripture
Pslams 88:1-8 (The Message)
God you're my last chance of the day.
I spend the night on my knees before you.
Put me on your salvation agenda;
take notes on the trouble I'm in.
I've had my fill of trouble;
I'm camped on the edge of hell.
I'm written off as a lost cause,
one more statistic, a hopeless case.
Abandoned as already dead,
one more body in a stack of corpses,
And not so much as a gravestone -
I'm a black hole in oblivion.
You've dropped me into a bottomless pit,
sunk me in a pitch-black abyss.
I'm battered senseless by your rage,
relentlessly pounded by your waves of anger.
You turned my friends against me,
made me horrible to them.
I'm caught in a maze and can't find my way out,
blinded by tears of pain and frustration.
jewish literature
When I was growing up I knew very little about other faiths. In fact, I knew little about anything that wasn't Christian; and mostly Lutheran-based Christianity. When I took Catechism at church (yes the ones I got kicked out of), we briefly discussed other Christian faiths (mostly Catholic). I remember touching on Jewish and Islam as well.
My public school education was fair. I won't say good. I suppose I give it a B- overall. I learned how to write fantastic papers and I was a great reader. Of course I'm not sure who taught me more - my family or the school system. However, the one are I got a sub-par education was history. I was lucky enough to have a History/Geography teacher as a father. He was horrified at many of the history teachers, and complained numerous times. However, the truth is: I did not get the best education when it came to history.
This is rather ironic, since my very favorite thing to read is historical books - fact or fiction in nature. I love learning about Great Britain - especially the Tudor family. I have also always had an affinity for the American Civil War and WWII. Even though we were taught about wars in school, it was always from the side of the winner. I grew up as an American in a northern state, so "we" won the American Revolutionary War as well as the Civil War. Also as an American, we could claim "winner" to both world wars. Pretty special, eh?
Did I learn about the losers? I suppose. But I really didn't get a good education on the real reasons wars were started, nor did I really understand the dramatic effect wars had on society. When I say "society" I mean the human race, not just the Michiganders teaching my history classes.
Last year I read a fabulous graphic novel called, "Maus". I'm not a comic book person, but when Jim checked out the novel from our library I was compelled to at least crack the cover. I found myself completely engulfed with the text and the story. I had never heard about this part of WWII before. Yes, I knew about the concentration camps, but when a friend was getting a doctorate in the subject I was completely dumbfounded. Why would someone want to do research in the Jewish holocaust?
I have since read a few novels based on the Jewish people during that horrific time period in history. If you are interested, I can give you a few great suggestions. Jim and I both believe that "Maus" should be a required reading for high school seniors, and both our girls will read it when they are "ready".
I just finished reading, "Tevye's Grandchildren," (yes the Tevye from that Fiddler on the Roof was based) which is a book about a woman's desire to rediscover her Jewish heritage. It is a pilgrimage for her, and even though I wasn't captivated by her writing style (very dry), I was captivated by further knowledge about the Jewish people. She made the argument that assimilation has destroyed the Jewish people. I must agree. As a "mutt" myself, I have recently realized all the language and traditions that were left in the "old country" when my ancestors came to America. My great-grandparents told my maternal grandparents that "we are Americans," rather than Germans or Swedes. My grandparents never learned the language of their heritage, because it wasn't spoke in the home. Since I teach Muslim children, I am reminded that they take Arabic classes to continue the traditions of their ancestors. In some ways I feel cheated.
In "Tevye's Grandchildren," the author writes, "Modernity is not simply a matter of education and income, skills and acquisitions, mobility and choice. It is also about how we think about ourselves in the world, the history we allow in."
I want to let in history - but I wonder how much truth of history is left to let in?
My public school education was fair. I won't say good. I suppose I give it a B- overall. I learned how to write fantastic papers and I was a great reader. Of course I'm not sure who taught me more - my family or the school system. However, the one are I got a sub-par education was history. I was lucky enough to have a History/Geography teacher as a father. He was horrified at many of the history teachers, and complained numerous times. However, the truth is: I did not get the best education when it came to history.
This is rather ironic, since my very favorite thing to read is historical books - fact or fiction in nature. I love learning about Great Britain - especially the Tudor family. I have also always had an affinity for the American Civil War and WWII. Even though we were taught about wars in school, it was always from the side of the winner. I grew up as an American in a northern state, so "we" won the American Revolutionary War as well as the Civil War. Also as an American, we could claim "winner" to both world wars. Pretty special, eh?
Did I learn about the losers? I suppose. But I really didn't get a good education on the real reasons wars were started, nor did I really understand the dramatic effect wars had on society. When I say "society" I mean the human race, not just the Michiganders teaching my history classes.
Last year I read a fabulous graphic novel called, "Maus". I'm not a comic book person, but when Jim checked out the novel from our library I was compelled to at least crack the cover. I found myself completely engulfed with the text and the story. I had never heard about this part of WWII before. Yes, I knew about the concentration camps, but when a friend was getting a doctorate in the subject I was completely dumbfounded. Why would someone want to do research in the Jewish holocaust?
I have since read a few novels based on the Jewish people during that horrific time period in history. If you are interested, I can give you a few great suggestions. Jim and I both believe that "Maus" should be a required reading for high school seniors, and both our girls will read it when they are "ready".
I just finished reading, "Tevye's Grandchildren," (yes the Tevye from that Fiddler on the Roof was based) which is a book about a woman's desire to rediscover her Jewish heritage. It is a pilgrimage for her, and even though I wasn't captivated by her writing style (very dry), I was captivated by further knowledge about the Jewish people. She made the argument that assimilation has destroyed the Jewish people. I must agree. As a "mutt" myself, I have recently realized all the language and traditions that were left in the "old country" when my ancestors came to America. My great-grandparents told my maternal grandparents that "we are Americans," rather than Germans or Swedes. My grandparents never learned the language of their heritage, because it wasn't spoke in the home. Since I teach Muslim children, I am reminded that they take Arabic classes to continue the traditions of their ancestors. In some ways I feel cheated.
In "Tevye's Grandchildren," the author writes, "Modernity is not simply a matter of education and income, skills and acquisitions, mobility and choice. It is also about how we think about ourselves in the world, the history we allow in."
I want to let in history - but I wonder how much truth of history is left to let in?
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
pilgrimage - day #4
Unfinished Business...
Gosh, how many of us can say that?!
I know I certainly could. Friendships lost, hurtful words spoken, relationships destroyed by others. And when can you say, "the business is finished"?
I must say that I have spent the last couple of years reconnecting, reconciling, and reestablishing what was once lost. I've also (in many cases) determined that some relationships are meant to be just as they were: abandoned.
In a previous post I mentioned that I had reconnected with my ex-husband (dear childhood friend). And I don't think it was necessarily the end of a story, but just the beginning of the next chapter in our "adult" lives.
The same thing cannot be said about an ex-boyfriend that I reconnected with a few years ago. We both had a lot of questions for each other, and we even met up and took my girls out to a few locations during his visit. While he was here I thought that we were reestablishing a friendship that could move us into the future. However, looking back at his visit only confirms that it was an end to our relationship (whether that be romantic or not). No regrets, no "I wishes". Just the occasional "I wonder what he's doing these days?" Of course I think this is normal with anyone from your past - whether the relationship is "finished" or "unfinished".
Todays reading mentions repentance. The author says, "The invitation to pilgrimage is an invitation to repent. Repentance is a godly sorrow, so deep as to cause one to change." I can't say that I entirely agree, but I also can't completely disagree either. Dictionary.com claims the following as the definition:
I suppose I do have regrets, but I don't think my 40-day pilgrimage could be illustrated by suggesting a repentance. But I do suppose thinking about the past and how I've been hurt; the situations that brought me to the place I am today; and what I want to learn from this pilgrimage could include repentance. I suppose that is for time to tell.
Today's reading:
Psalms 25:8-11 (The Message)
God is fair and just;
He corrects the misdirected,
Sends them in the right direction.
He gives the rejects his hand,
And leads them step-by-step.
From now on every road you travel
Will take you to God.
Follow the Covenant signs;
Read the charted directions.
Keep up your reputation, God;
Forgive my bad life;
It's been a very bad life.
Gosh, how many of us can say that?!
I know I certainly could. Friendships lost, hurtful words spoken, relationships destroyed by others. And when can you say, "the business is finished"?
I must say that I have spent the last couple of years reconnecting, reconciling, and reestablishing what was once lost. I've also (in many cases) determined that some relationships are meant to be just as they were: abandoned.
In a previous post I mentioned that I had reconnected with my ex-husband (dear childhood friend). And I don't think it was necessarily the end of a story, but just the beginning of the next chapter in our "adult" lives.
The same thing cannot be said about an ex-boyfriend that I reconnected with a few years ago. We both had a lot of questions for each other, and we even met up and took my girls out to a few locations during his visit. While he was here I thought that we were reestablishing a friendship that could move us into the future. However, looking back at his visit only confirms that it was an end to our relationship (whether that be romantic or not). No regrets, no "I wishes". Just the occasional "I wonder what he's doing these days?" Of course I think this is normal with anyone from your past - whether the relationship is "finished" or "unfinished".
Todays reading mentions repentance. The author says, "The invitation to pilgrimage is an invitation to repent. Repentance is a godly sorrow, so deep as to cause one to change." I can't say that I entirely agree, but I also can't completely disagree either. Dictionary.com claims the following as the definition:
re⋅pent⋅ance
noun| 1. | deep sorrow, compunction, or contrition for a past sin, wrongdoing, or the like. |
| 2. | regret for any past action. |
I suppose I do have regrets, but I don't think my 40-day pilgrimage could be illustrated by suggesting a repentance. But I do suppose thinking about the past and how I've been hurt; the situations that brought me to the place I am today; and what I want to learn from this pilgrimage could include repentance. I suppose that is for time to tell.
Today's reading:
Psalms 25:8-11 (The Message)
God is fair and just;
He corrects the misdirected,
Sends them in the right direction.
He gives the rejects his hand,
And leads them step-by-step.
From now on every road you travel
Will take you to God.
Follow the Covenant signs;
Read the charted directions.
Keep up your reputation, God;
Forgive my bad life;
It's been a very bad life.
my relationship with Bonnie #4
Today was my 4th visit with Bonnie, and we finally got to the end of Chapter 9 in "What Does the Bible Really Teach?" To be honest (and I told her this), I need to move to a different chapter. I was glad to finish it up today. Too much sadness in this particular chapter - of course it is based on the "end days" scripture. We start at the beginning next week - Chapter 1: "What is the Truth About God?"
One thing I've learned by studying with Bonnie, is that there are other books in the Bible that speak of the end times. You'd think after reading the Bible from cover to cover last year I would remember this. But I think I was reading it to READ it; now I'm reading to UNDERSTAND the Word.
Daniel is one book that falls into the above category. The following is a particularly poignant passage:
Daniel 12:9-10 (The Message)
"'Go on about your business, Daniel, he said. 'The message is confidential and under lock and key until the end, until things are to be wrapped up. The populace will be washed clean and made like new. But the wicked will just keep on being wicked, without a clue about what is happening. Those who live wisely and well will understand what's going on.'
I've often thought that ignorance is a blissful place to be. Observing those that have blind faith; without question; without hesitation. I've NEVER been that person.
I have always questioned people. Especially those of faith. I was kicked out of catechism twice for my inability to just believe the answers given by the minister. If they had given scripture to back up the beliefs I probably would have shut up. But the beliefs were man-invented. And reluctantly, at the demand of my parents, I wrote the apologetic papers required for my re-admittance into the program. Yes, when I say I was kicked out of catechism, I wasn't joking.
Many heads of church would rather a question be ignored. And it wasn't that I didn't want to be Christian that I asked these questions. I was asking WHY we believe what we believe. The doctrine, the orthodoxy, the laws: all man-made. God didn't say these things...and so far I haven't found a Bible that backs up some of the crazy things I was told were "truths". For example: I was kicked out because I didn't buy into the idea that unbaptized babies (or children) went to hell when they died. I couldn't grasp such a horrific idea. Was this "god" of ours a loving one...or a vengeful one? And there wasn't even baptism in the Old Testament...so what about that?!
My favorite verse from today addresses my concern from years ago:
1 Corinthians 7:13-14 (The Message)
So this is what you must do. If you are a man with a wife who is not a believer but who still wants to live with you, hold on to her. If you are a woman with a husband who is not a believer but he wants to live with you, hold on to him. The unbelieving husband share to an extent in the holiness of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is likewise is likewise touched by the holiness of her husband. Otherwise, your children would be left out; as it is, they are also included in the spiritual purposes of God.
Children are holy! See! I wish the pastor who kicked me out of class was still alive. I would send him this scripture today.
And thus ends my study session this week.
One thing I've learned by studying with Bonnie, is that there are other books in the Bible that speak of the end times. You'd think after reading the Bible from cover to cover last year I would remember this. But I think I was reading it to READ it; now I'm reading to UNDERSTAND the Word.
Daniel is one book that falls into the above category. The following is a particularly poignant passage:
Daniel 12:9-10 (The Message)
"'Go on about your business, Daniel, he said. 'The message is confidential and under lock and key until the end, until things are to be wrapped up. The populace will be washed clean and made like new. But the wicked will just keep on being wicked, without a clue about what is happening. Those who live wisely and well will understand what's going on.'
I've often thought that ignorance is a blissful place to be. Observing those that have blind faith; without question; without hesitation. I've NEVER been that person.
I have always questioned people. Especially those of faith. I was kicked out of catechism twice for my inability to just believe the answers given by the minister. If they had given scripture to back up the beliefs I probably would have shut up. But the beliefs were man-invented. And reluctantly, at the demand of my parents, I wrote the apologetic papers required for my re-admittance into the program. Yes, when I say I was kicked out of catechism, I wasn't joking.
Many heads of church would rather a question be ignored. And it wasn't that I didn't want to be Christian that I asked these questions. I was asking WHY we believe what we believe. The doctrine, the orthodoxy, the laws: all man-made. God didn't say these things...and so far I haven't found a Bible that backs up some of the crazy things I was told were "truths". For example: I was kicked out because I didn't buy into the idea that unbaptized babies (or children) went to hell when they died. I couldn't grasp such a horrific idea. Was this "god" of ours a loving one...or a vengeful one? And there wasn't even baptism in the Old Testament...so what about that?!
My favorite verse from today addresses my concern from years ago:
1 Corinthians 7:13-14 (The Message)
So this is what you must do. If you are a man with a wife who is not a believer but who still wants to live with you, hold on to her. If you are a woman with a husband who is not a believer but he wants to live with you, hold on to him. The unbelieving husband share to an extent in the holiness of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is likewise is likewise touched by the holiness of her husband. Otherwise, your children would be left out; as it is, they are also included in the spiritual purposes of God.
Children are holy! See! I wish the pastor who kicked me out of class was still alive. I would send him this scripture today.
And thus ends my study session this week.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
pilgrimage - day #3
So here I begin day 3, and the topic is beads and baubles. The amusing part is that earlier this morning the girls and I took a short trip to the neighborhood Walmart. If you know me, you know I'm NOT a Walmart shopper. However, after striking out at Target yesterday, I decided to search Google for a white book case. Why white? Well it matches the other 3-shelf book case in the basement. I am trying to match as best as possible. Walmart had one for a great price, so off we went this morning to pick it up.
While we were there, the girls spied a variety of "ooh, look at that" items. One of the aisles had a bunch of bead collection boxes. Zoe and Eva have both made beaded bracelets, and we have a smattering of colorful baubles that Zoe loves playing with. However, I've always been drawn to the process of making things, so I was seriously considering adding to our collection. I didn't, but thought I might purchase a kit for Zoe for Christmas...justifying children's toys is much easier when you have kids.
The study today talked about making prayer beads for meditation. I have always found the Catholic tradition of using prayer beads to be calming and spiritually beautiful. Jim has his grandfather's rosary, and it's such a lovely relic of him. He touched the beads, he prayed using them as a guide. How much more intimate of a personal relic could you have?
Anyway, I am now inspired to make my own set of prayer beads. I think I'd like to have wooden beads, and ones that were tactically interesting. I would imagine in times of trouble I could pull out the beads and treat them as worry dolls. Did anyone ever have them? My sister did. The little dolls came in a small oblong box. The theory was to put your cares and worries upon the dolls and return them to the little box. The dolls would take care of your troubles and/or problems...leaving you relieved and refreshed.
I would like that same opportunity to help when praying. Maybe incorporating a mantra a meditatation so to speak.
Now onto finding those beads!
Today's passage:
Psalms 19:11 (NIV)
My the words of my mouth
and the meditation of my heart
be pleasing in your site,
O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer
While we were there, the girls spied a variety of "ooh, look at that" items. One of the aisles had a bunch of bead collection boxes. Zoe and Eva have both made beaded bracelets, and we have a smattering of colorful baubles that Zoe loves playing with. However, I've always been drawn to the process of making things, so I was seriously considering adding to our collection. I didn't, but thought I might purchase a kit for Zoe for Christmas...justifying children's toys is much easier when you have kids.
The study today talked about making prayer beads for meditation. I have always found the Catholic tradition of using prayer beads to be calming and spiritually beautiful. Jim has his grandfather's rosary, and it's such a lovely relic of him. He touched the beads, he prayed using them as a guide. How much more intimate of a personal relic could you have?
Anyway, I am now inspired to make my own set of prayer beads. I think I'd like to have wooden beads, and ones that were tactically interesting. I would imagine in times of trouble I could pull out the beads and treat them as worry dolls. Did anyone ever have them? My sister did. The little dolls came in a small oblong box. The theory was to put your cares and worries upon the dolls and return them to the little box. The dolls would take care of your troubles and/or problems...leaving you relieved and refreshed.
I would like that same opportunity to help when praying. Maybe incorporating a mantra a meditatation so to speak.
Now onto finding those beads!
Today's passage:
Psalms 19:11 (NIV)
My the words of my mouth
and the meditation of my heart
be pleasing in your site,
O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer
Monday, August 17, 2009
pilgrimage - day #2
Reading for today:
Psalms 34:11-14 (The Message)
Come, children, listen closely
I'll give you a lesson in God worship.
Who out there has a lust for life?
Can't wait each day to come upon beauty?
Guard your tongue from profanity,
and no my lying through your teeth.
Turn your back on sin; do something good
Embrace peace- don't let it get away!
I think the most interesting comment I've heard and read lately (via Facebook or the Internet) has been "drama-free." There seems to be a lot of people desiring to be "drama-free". In fact, I think my favorite status message was, "why does drama follow me wherever I go?"
At first this desire would seem to be a substantiated one. I'm not sure if there is anyone out there that desires to live in a constant dramatic and emotional roller coaster. Of course, some would love to be in a drama - or stage production...but that's a different kind of drama. I believe that drama isn't a person, so therefore it doesn't "seek" out certain people. There are always dramatic occurrences to be acknowledged, but I think it has more to do with how the person reacts to life - the perception of events and people.
Here's an example:
This morning I woke up (a bit earlier than I had hoped), and while doing the morning chores (i.e. dishes out of dishwasher, making coffee, etc.) I noticed a bunch of cat puke on the carpet and chair in the basement. Then while getting myself ready for the day (shower, etc.), Zoe wanted me to help her find clothes to wear. When I told her I would help in a few minutes, she starting contorting herself on the floor and moaning about how she needed help - her diva behavior. Then our 10am play-date was canceled. So I allowed the girls to pick a "craft" to do, and Zoe chose glitter glues. Glitter is my most hated craft item. Lots of fun glitter clean up later I finally was able to sit down and read my morning email. Phew!
How does the proceeding paragraph sound? Overwhelming? Negative maybe? The truth is: every morning, in my house, there is puke or a cat mess to clean. Every day includes many emotional responses to what I state (which is all normal when children are testing boundaries). And life doesn't always go smoothly; you must be flexible - not having the play date was really okay in my book!
Therefore, I truly believe it is how you spin things that makes a situation dramatic or not.
Some people remind me of the boy who cried wolf. Always having a problem. Nothing is just "normal" everyday stuff. Therefore others begin to label these people dramatic. So when something really horrible happens people start thinking, "ugh...another drama thing."
I can't say that I haven't lived in a constant state of drama. But since I have taken a step back and truly viewed my life, I realize I don't have the patience for dramatic life. I have pulled away from friendships, in the last year, that drain me of my positive energy and tend to suck me into a dramatic situation. It's hard to stay out of problems, especially when you care about the people involved. But it is so much healthier for myself, and my family, to avoid situations that would start the downward spiral of drama.
Another point in the verse for today was: profanity. I used to swear like a sailor. Teaching helped me stop the constant language that wasn't pleasant. However, being a mom and spelling words (like stupid, dick, etc.) has begun to get old. So I think I am going to make a HUGE effort and stop all swearing (verbal or non-verbal) during this Bible study. Hopefully it will permanently stay once the study is over. After all, 10 years ago I gave up soda pop for Lent and I have only had it a few times since (and only when I was sick or pregnant). I don't even like the flavor of pop. So hopefully I won't like the flavor of swear words after 40 days!
Psalms 34:11-14 (The Message)
Come, children, listen closely
I'll give you a lesson in God worship.
Who out there has a lust for life?
Can't wait each day to come upon beauty?
Guard your tongue from profanity,
and no my lying through your teeth.
Turn your back on sin; do something good
Embrace peace- don't let it get away!
I think the most interesting comment I've heard and read lately (via Facebook or the Internet) has been "drama-free." There seems to be a lot of people desiring to be "drama-free". In fact, I think my favorite status message was, "why does drama follow me wherever I go?"
At first this desire would seem to be a substantiated one. I'm not sure if there is anyone out there that desires to live in a constant dramatic and emotional roller coaster. Of course, some would love to be in a drama - or stage production...but that's a different kind of drama. I believe that drama isn't a person, so therefore it doesn't "seek" out certain people. There are always dramatic occurrences to be acknowledged, but I think it has more to do with how the person reacts to life - the perception of events and people.
Here's an example:
This morning I woke up (a bit earlier than I had hoped), and while doing the morning chores (i.e. dishes out of dishwasher, making coffee, etc.) I noticed a bunch of cat puke on the carpet and chair in the basement. Then while getting myself ready for the day (shower, etc.), Zoe wanted me to help her find clothes to wear. When I told her I would help in a few minutes, she starting contorting herself on the floor and moaning about how she needed help - her diva behavior. Then our 10am play-date was canceled. So I allowed the girls to pick a "craft" to do, and Zoe chose glitter glues. Glitter is my most hated craft item. Lots of fun glitter clean up later I finally was able to sit down and read my morning email. Phew!
How does the proceeding paragraph sound? Overwhelming? Negative maybe? The truth is: every morning, in my house, there is puke or a cat mess to clean. Every day includes many emotional responses to what I state (which is all normal when children are testing boundaries). And life doesn't always go smoothly; you must be flexible - not having the play date was really okay in my book!
Therefore, I truly believe it is how you spin things that makes a situation dramatic or not.
Some people remind me of the boy who cried wolf. Always having a problem. Nothing is just "normal" everyday stuff. Therefore others begin to label these people dramatic. So when something really horrible happens people start thinking, "ugh...another drama thing."
I can't say that I haven't lived in a constant state of drama. But since I have taken a step back and truly viewed my life, I realize I don't have the patience for dramatic life. I have pulled away from friendships, in the last year, that drain me of my positive energy and tend to suck me into a dramatic situation. It's hard to stay out of problems, especially when you care about the people involved. But it is so much healthier for myself, and my family, to avoid situations that would start the downward spiral of drama.
Another point in the verse for today was: profanity. I used to swear like a sailor. Teaching helped me stop the constant language that wasn't pleasant. However, being a mom and spelling words (like stupid, dick, etc.) has begun to get old. So I think I am going to make a HUGE effort and stop all swearing (verbal or non-verbal) during this Bible study. Hopefully it will permanently stay once the study is over. After all, 10 years ago I gave up soda pop for Lent and I have only had it a few times since (and only when I was sick or pregnant). I don't even like the flavor of pop. So hopefully I won't like the flavor of swear words after 40 days!
Sunday, August 16, 2009
pilgrimage - day #1
Amongst the weekly meetings with Bonnie, I have decided to start a daily personal journey with God.
I am doing a 40-day journey starting today (August 16th) and ending September 24th. The literature I am following is called: Pilgrimage by Patricia D. Brown. Even though I continue on a weekly journey with Bonnie, and my Bible study at church begins on September 20th, I feel a thirst for more devotions.
As some of you know, I go to a church that was originally founded by Pilgrims many years ago. So I felt a kindred spirit towards the literature above.
I want to include those that are interested in reading my feelings and frustrations. Please come back daily to read and experience my journey.
Today's passage:
Psalm 38:9-16 (The Message)
Lord, my longings are sitting in plain sight,
my groans an old story to you.
My heart's about to break;
I'm a burned-out case.
Cataracts blind me to God and good;
old friends avoid me like the plague.
My cousins never visit,
my neighbors stab me in the back.
My competitors blacken my name,
devoutly they pray for my ruin.
But I'm deaf and mute to it all,
ears shut, mouth shut.
I don't hear a word they say,
don't speak a work in response.
What I do, God, is wait for you,
wait for my Lord, my God - you will answer!
I wait and pray so they won't laugh me off,
won't smugly strut off when I stumble.
Recently I became friends with my ex-husband's wife. We share a common thread of understanding and her initial email surprised me. However, as we continued to write, it was apparent we were so similar. We have very similar values, morals, and desires for our children (she has a 5 year old daughter). We even have the same favorite movie: Gone With the Wind.
Impossible for some to understand or even deem thinkable, our families came together yesterday to enjoy each other's company. And we all got along. Not just civilly, but the way old friends would get along.
I suppose I must state that my ex-husband and I had known each other since Kindergarten (pretty much at the same ages as our daughters). We grew up sharing in many life experiences. Getting married was a mistake, as we both learned. However, had we not got married, I'm sure we would have continued that friendship over the last 9 years; rather than ignoring each other, hoping the past would stay there.
A few years ago I had tried contacting him. More or less hoping to put aside anger and/or hurt. He wasn't ready then, so my email was ignored.
Yes, there is a time for everything. I'm just glad that our girls are able to share in friendship just like we did years ago.
My children have inspired me to be friends with those that I may not have thought would be friends. Just excepting a Jehovah Witness into my home for a weekly Bible study was a step in the right direction. I do believe since there is one GOD we are all one PEOPLE.
My desire is to surround my children with people that share in our morals, values and love for our neighbors - whether those people are old, young, or somewhere in between. We can't ultimately pick who our children choose as friends, but I know that if the foundation is solid their choices will prove successful.
In reflecting further on the Bible verse above, I am very touched by what it says. Do I care too much about what others think?
When I was younger I spent so much time worrying about if people liked me. Trying to fit into "popular" groups or the "in" crowd. I listened to the opinions, and I let the negative cloud my vision. I let the words stab my heart and soul. I was NOT the "normal" kid growing up. And that truly bothered me. In fact, I think it took until I had my daughters that I realized my obsession with pleasing others. And do these others matter? No. The only one I need to please is God.
So I hope during this 40-day pilgrimage I am able to become closer to God, and ultimately learn how to live a more devoted life. With my children and husband as inspiration, I am confident this journey will be successful. However, I'm sure I will struggle with emotions and turmoil along the way.
namaste
I am doing a 40-day journey starting today (August 16th) and ending September 24th. The literature I am following is called: Pilgrimage by Patricia D. Brown. Even though I continue on a weekly journey with Bonnie, and my Bible study at church begins on September 20th, I feel a thirst for more devotions.
As some of you know, I go to a church that was originally founded by Pilgrims many years ago. So I felt a kindred spirit towards the literature above.
I want to include those that are interested in reading my feelings and frustrations. Please come back daily to read and experience my journey.
Today's passage:
Psalm 38:9-16 (The Message)
Lord, my longings are sitting in plain sight,
my groans an old story to you.
My heart's about to break;
I'm a burned-out case.
Cataracts blind me to God and good;
old friends avoid me like the plague.
My cousins never visit,
my neighbors stab me in the back.
My competitors blacken my name,
devoutly they pray for my ruin.
But I'm deaf and mute to it all,
ears shut, mouth shut.
I don't hear a word they say,
don't speak a work in response.
What I do, God, is wait for you,
wait for my Lord, my God - you will answer!
I wait and pray so they won't laugh me off,
won't smugly strut off when I stumble.
Recently I became friends with my ex-husband's wife. We share a common thread of understanding and her initial email surprised me. However, as we continued to write, it was apparent we were so similar. We have very similar values, morals, and desires for our children (she has a 5 year old daughter). We even have the same favorite movie: Gone With the Wind.
Impossible for some to understand or even deem thinkable, our families came together yesterday to enjoy each other's company. And we all got along. Not just civilly, but the way old friends would get along.
I suppose I must state that my ex-husband and I had known each other since Kindergarten (pretty much at the same ages as our daughters). We grew up sharing in many life experiences. Getting married was a mistake, as we both learned. However, had we not got married, I'm sure we would have continued that friendship over the last 9 years; rather than ignoring each other, hoping the past would stay there.
A few years ago I had tried contacting him. More or less hoping to put aside anger and/or hurt. He wasn't ready then, so my email was ignored.
Yes, there is a time for everything. I'm just glad that our girls are able to share in friendship just like we did years ago.
My children have inspired me to be friends with those that I may not have thought would be friends. Just excepting a Jehovah Witness into my home for a weekly Bible study was a step in the right direction. I do believe since there is one GOD we are all one PEOPLE.
My desire is to surround my children with people that share in our morals, values and love for our neighbors - whether those people are old, young, or somewhere in between. We can't ultimately pick who our children choose as friends, but I know that if the foundation is solid their choices will prove successful.
In reflecting further on the Bible verse above, I am very touched by what it says. Do I care too much about what others think?
When I was younger I spent so much time worrying about if people liked me. Trying to fit into "popular" groups or the "in" crowd. I listened to the opinions, and I let the negative cloud my vision. I let the words stab my heart and soul. I was NOT the "normal" kid growing up. And that truly bothered me. In fact, I think it took until I had my daughters that I realized my obsession with pleasing others. And do these others matter? No. The only one I need to please is God.
So I hope during this 40-day pilgrimage I am able to become closer to God, and ultimately learn how to live a more devoted life. With my children and husband as inspiration, I am confident this journey will be successful. However, I'm sure I will struggle with emotions and turmoil along the way.
namaste
Saturday, August 15, 2009
my relationship with Bonnie #3
originally written August 12
Bonnie came over this morning - I always love our meetings.
We are still in chapter 9 from "What Does the Bible Really Teach". This was the chapter I selected to look at first - mostly because I was curious how the Witnesses view Revelations and the "end times". The reason we are still in this chapter is because I have spent the last couple sessions asking questions that deviate from the text. I'm always questioning things, and impressively enough Bonnie has the answer from her studies.
Today's focus came from the signs that we are indeed in the "end days". As always we refer to Bible passages that support the text. Today Timothy 3:1-7 was read as one of those verses. I was completely touched by verse 7, and here are three versions of the Bible:
NIV
"...always learning but never able to acknowledge the truth."
Message
"They get exploited every time and never really learn."
NWT (yes, I got my Witness Bible today)
"...always learning and yet never able to come to an accurate knowledge of the truth."
This verse made me think of two things:
1) When people say they have "heard" what you say, but you question if they really have "listened".
2) My recent discovery that searching for "the next thing" is not going to be truly satisfying.
I believe that the difference between hearing someone and truly listening is the difference between the brain and the heart. Yes, I know the heart isn't a "feeling" organ, but lets just say it is a figurative "feeling" organ. When you hear someone you are using your auditory abilities to hear a sound...to acknowledge the sound was coming from a particular source...nodding your head, but not really caring what is being said.
Listening uses the ability to care, empathize, and sometimes sympathize for the person you are getting information from. It's more than using a "sense" of hearing, but using the ability to have compassion for the individual speaking.
So when you say to someone, "are you listening to me?" and they say, "yes!" What they probably mean is, "yes, I heard you speaking." This difference between listening and hearing is one of my pet peeves about people.
As for the journey of my career...I suppose the dream I had the other night said it all. I was back in college over at HFCC. I was taking a math/economics course, hoping to use the knowledge for a new career. The class was every day for 3 hours. I was the only one in the class that had two associate degrees, a bachelors degree, and post grad work. The teacher/professor was this attractive Indian man that spoke in broken English. He told me that he didn't understand why I didn't just teach music and be happy with it. He said I could come to the class, but that I already knew too much. So he suggested coming to the last hour - and I could have a study time in another room for the first two hours. He also suggested sleeping. At the end of the dream I had realized that I was being ridiculous. I hate math - always have; and I hate economics too! What the hell was I thinking by taking a course that incorporated both of them?!
When I woke up, I realized that I do have a career. I have increased my private lesson load for the fall, and I'm going to be continuing my work at the church. I suppose that I often consider my job as a "jobby" (i.e. hobby job). But it is truly more than that. I am enriching people's lives, I am doing something I'm GREAT at...and I really do love it.
So I also asked Bonnie if there are rules about TV viewing and other technology in the Witness faith. She said that on Tuesday evenings there are classes that help with ministering the Bible to homes (i.e. the home study we are doing). However, the classes also deal with making decisions about "what would God approve of". Behaving the way God wants us to behave - which covers everything from alcohol consumption, to what we watch on TV.
As a mother of two (VERY AWARE) little girls, I am constantly supervising what they are watching, reading, listening to... Sometimes I think I'm probably a bit over protective because the girls don't watch Sponge Bob or have Bratz dolls or watch movies that aren't G rated. And I know the "average" child is much more worldly than my girls, but that is OKAY! I have surrounded them with people (old and young) that I believe are positive influences on them. My hope is when they choose friends they will compare them to the ones they already know, love and respect.
Maybe that's being naive, but I beg to differ. I am extremely intelligent: book and world. I think there is a time to learn everything (Ecclesiastes my favorite book in the Bible), but I also don't think my girls need to learn everything now.
Have a wonderful day!
Bonnie came over this morning - I always love our meetings.
We are still in chapter 9 from "What Does the Bible Really Teach". This was the chapter I selected to look at first - mostly because I was curious how the Witnesses view Revelations and the "end times". The reason we are still in this chapter is because I have spent the last couple sessions asking questions that deviate from the text. I'm always questioning things, and impressively enough Bonnie has the answer from her studies.
Today's focus came from the signs that we are indeed in the "end days". As always we refer to Bible passages that support the text. Today Timothy 3:1-7 was read as one of those verses. I was completely touched by verse 7, and here are three versions of the Bible:
NIV
"...always learning but never able to acknowledge the truth."
Message
"They get exploited every time and never really learn."
NWT (yes, I got my Witness Bible today)
"...always learning and yet never able to come to an accurate knowledge of the truth."
This verse made me think of two things:
1) When people say they have "heard" what you say, but you question if they really have "listened".
2) My recent discovery that searching for "the next thing" is not going to be truly satisfying.
I believe that the difference between hearing someone and truly listening is the difference between the brain and the heart. Yes, I know the heart isn't a "feeling" organ, but lets just say it is a figurative "feeling" organ. When you hear someone you are using your auditory abilities to hear a sound...to acknowledge the sound was coming from a particular source...nodding your head, but not really caring what is being said.
Listening uses the ability to care, empathize, and sometimes sympathize for the person you are getting information from. It's more than using a "sense" of hearing, but using the ability to have compassion for the individual speaking.
So when you say to someone, "are you listening to me?" and they say, "yes!" What they probably mean is, "yes, I heard you speaking." This difference between listening and hearing is one of my pet peeves about people.
As for the journey of my career...I suppose the dream I had the other night said it all. I was back in college over at HFCC. I was taking a math/economics course, hoping to use the knowledge for a new career. The class was every day for 3 hours. I was the only one in the class that had two associate degrees, a bachelors degree, and post grad work. The teacher/professor was this attractive Indian man that spoke in broken English. He told me that he didn't understand why I didn't just teach music and be happy with it. He said I could come to the class, but that I already knew too much. So he suggested coming to the last hour - and I could have a study time in another room for the first two hours. He also suggested sleeping. At the end of the dream I had realized that I was being ridiculous. I hate math - always have; and I hate economics too! What the hell was I thinking by taking a course that incorporated both of them?!
When I woke up, I realized that I do have a career. I have increased my private lesson load for the fall, and I'm going to be continuing my work at the church. I suppose that I often consider my job as a "jobby" (i.e. hobby job). But it is truly more than that. I am enriching people's lives, I am doing something I'm GREAT at...and I really do love it.
So I also asked Bonnie if there are rules about TV viewing and other technology in the Witness faith. She said that on Tuesday evenings there are classes that help with ministering the Bible to homes (i.e. the home study we are doing). However, the classes also deal with making decisions about "what would God approve of". Behaving the way God wants us to behave - which covers everything from alcohol consumption, to what we watch on TV.
As a mother of two (VERY AWARE) little girls, I am constantly supervising what they are watching, reading, listening to... Sometimes I think I'm probably a bit over protective because the girls don't watch Sponge Bob or have Bratz dolls or watch movies that aren't G rated. And I know the "average" child is much more worldly than my girls, but that is OKAY! I have surrounded them with people (old and young) that I believe are positive influences on them. My hope is when they choose friends they will compare them to the ones they already know, love and respect.
Maybe that's being naive, but I beg to differ. I am extremely intelligent: book and world. I think there is a time to learn everything (Ecclesiastes my favorite book in the Bible), but I also don't think my girls need to learn everything now.
Have a wonderful day!
my relationship with Bonnie (between the sessions)
originally written August 5th
So due that an hour ago Zoe started puking (most likely from the gobs of phlegm in her throat), I had to cancel my Wednesday morning Bible study with Bonnie.
Zoe is eating ice chips - hopefully things get better soon. Eva seems fine., just a plugged nose..LOL!
So I thought I'd mention a few questions I wanted to bring up to Bonnie today.
1) The Witnesses have a calculation of when the end time began: 1914. I thought I understood. However, according to the passage in "What Does the Bible Really Teach" there is reference to Revelation chapter 12. The Witnesses claim that the verbiage equals three and a half times. Here is what the NIV has written in 12:14, "...for a time, times and a half a time. I get that time = 1 year. But how are we so sure that times = 2? The Message has the same verbiage.
On Got Questions (http://www.gotquestions.org/Revelation-chapter-12.html ) their interpretation of the same passage is:
"When it speaks of the woman fleeing into the wilderness for 1,260 days, it is referring to the future time called the tribulation period. Twelve hundred sixty days is 42 months of 30 days each. 42 months is 3 1/2 years."
Many scholars believe that the number is symbolic. So where are the Jehovah Witnesses getting this information? How do they know their calculations are correct? Last week Bonnie's friend, Lori, was quick to say that it will be the generation that was around in 1914 that will see the "end". The "generation" being 100 years. I just wonder what will happen when 2014 comes and the "end" hasn't happened. I wonder what figures will be determined then...
2) In the following chapter of, "What Does the Bible Really Teach", we are told about Spirit Creatures and how they affect us. Long story short there are no longer good spirits on Earth, so only the demonic are left. This is a great story. Anyway, our society is being mislead by the demons. This misleading practice is summed up in the word: divination. I had never heard of the word before. Jim informed me that in Dungeons & Dragons there are divination spells. Anyway, in the book states, "some forms of divination are astrology, the use of tarot cards, crystal gazing, palmistry, and the search for mysterious omens, or signs, in dreams."
So this got me thinking...wasn't John having a premonition dream that he wrote about in Revelations? And in the Old Testament, didn't Joseph (the multi-colored coat guy) have prophetic dreams that ultimately brought him into the Pharaoh's favor? So then what is the line between prophecy and divination? And how can you be certain that one isn't the other and vise versa? I'm really curious about the Jehovah Witness view on this.
However, since I wanted a clearer answer today, I went to the Internet. Yahoo Answers had a really good description. It also included another word, augury, that I had never heard.
"Prophecy: divine revelation as uttered by someone said to be a prophet. A prophet is defined as someone who is in direct communication with the Divine and speaks on behalf of the Divine.
Example: Noah. God spoke directly to Noah and told Noah about the upcoming flood. There were no indicators of a flood, Noah didn't use some magic ritual to learn about the flood....God spoke directly to Noah and told Noah. Noah thus tried to warn others. His warnings are prophecy because he is a prophet.
Augury: this is where omens or signs signal some future event. Example: "he hoped it was an augury" that is to say "he hoped it was a sign from God"
Example: Many Christians use the words from prophets of the old testament that foretold the events that would indicate the messiah...they then conclude that these events occurred with Jesus. Jesus is also a good example in that he provided "signs" for the end of days, for his return. Many shamanic religions also use augury, or signs, in nature to indicate supposed future events such as animal behaviors, etc.
Divination: this is using a ritual or ceremony of some kind to predict the future. Example: using a crystal ball, tarot cards, etc to predict the future. This is what most people think about when they think of fortune telling, future prediction. That people are using some kind of ritual, ceremony, or set of tools (and magic) to foresee the future.
Soothsaying: A soothsayer is also called by term "seer", this is someone who "sees" the future events and tells others. Many times a soothsayer sees these in dreams or visions.
Example: Joseph in the Bible would be called a soothsayer because he soothsayed...that is he interpreted dreams (though in this case the dreams were not his own, they were Pharoah's dreams). We don't really use this term much anymore. Today we call soothsayers by a different name: psychics. People who have visions of the future whether in dreams when they sleep or in visions while awake. That's what it soothsaying means.
So there ya have it - my continued journey of enlightenment...
So due that an hour ago Zoe started puking (most likely from the gobs of phlegm in her throat), I had to cancel my Wednesday morning Bible study with Bonnie.
Zoe is eating ice chips - hopefully things get better soon. Eva seems fine., just a plugged nose..LOL!
So I thought I'd mention a few questions I wanted to bring up to Bonnie today.
1) The Witnesses have a calculation of when the end time began: 1914. I thought I understood. However, according to the passage in "What Does the Bible Really Teach" there is reference to Revelation chapter 12. The Witnesses claim that the verbiage equals three and a half times. Here is what the NIV has written in 12:14, "...for a time, times and a half a time. I get that time = 1 year. But how are we so sure that times = 2? The Message has the same verbiage.
On Got Questions (http://www.gotquestions.or
"When it speaks of the woman fleeing into the wilderness for 1,260 days, it is referring to the future time called the tribulation period. Twelve hundred sixty days is 42 months of 30 days each. 42 months is 3 1/2 years."
Many scholars believe that the number is symbolic. So where are the Jehovah Witnesses getting this information? How do they know their calculations are correct? Last week Bonnie's friend, Lori, was quick to say that it will be the generation that was around in 1914 that will see the "end". The "generation" being 100 years. I just wonder what will happen when 2014 comes and the "end" hasn't happened. I wonder what figures will be determined then...
2) In the following chapter of, "What Does the Bible Really Teach", we are told about Spirit Creatures and how they affect us. Long story short there are no longer good spirits on Earth, so only the demonic are left. This is a great story. Anyway, our society is being mislead by the demons. This misleading practice is summed up in the word: divination. I had never heard of the word before. Jim informed me that in Dungeons & Dragons there are divination spells. Anyway, in the book states, "some forms of divination are astrology, the use of tarot cards, crystal gazing, palmistry, and the search for mysterious omens, or signs, in dreams."
So this got me thinking...wasn't John having a premonition dream that he wrote about in Revelations? And in the Old Testament, didn't Joseph (the multi-colored coat guy) have prophetic dreams that ultimately brought him into the Pharaoh's favor? So then what is the line between prophecy and divination? And how can you be certain that one isn't the other and vise versa? I'm really curious about the Jehovah Witness view on this.
However, since I wanted a clearer answer today, I went to the Internet. Yahoo Answers had a really good description. It also included another word, augury, that I had never heard.
"Prophecy: divine revelation as uttered by someone said to be a prophet. A prophet is defined as someone who is in direct communication with the Divine and speaks on behalf of the Divine.
Example: Noah. God spoke directly to Noah and told Noah about the upcoming flood. There were no indicators of a flood, Noah didn't use some magic ritual to learn about the flood....God spoke directly to Noah and told Noah. Noah thus tried to warn others. His warnings are prophecy because he is a prophet.
Augury: this is where omens or signs signal some future event. Example: "he hoped it was an augury" that is to say "he hoped it was a sign from God"
Example: Many Christians use the words from prophets of the old testament that foretold the events that would indicate the messiah...they then conclude that these events occurred with Jesus. Jesus is also a good example in that he provided "signs" for the end of days, for his return. Many shamanic religions also use augury, or signs, in nature to indicate supposed future events such as animal behaviors, etc.
Divination: this is using a ritual or ceremony of some kind to predict the future. Example: using a crystal ball, tarot cards, etc to predict the future. This is what most people think about when they think of fortune telling, future prediction. That people are using some kind of ritual, ceremony, or set of tools (and magic) to foresee the future.
Soothsaying: A soothsayer is also called by term "seer", this is someone who "sees" the future events and tells others. Many times a soothsayer sees these in dreams or visions.
Example: Joseph in the Bible would be called a soothsayer because he soothsayed...that is he interpreted dreams (though in this case the dreams were not his own, they were Pharoah's dreams). We don't really use this term much anymore. Today we call soothsayers by a different name: psychics. People who have visions of the future whether in dreams when they sleep or in visions while awake. That's what it soothsaying means.
So there ya have it - my continued journey of enlightenment...
my relationship with Bonnie #2
Originally written July 29th
After almost two weeks of added questions and research, Bonnie returned as promised.
At our last meeting we had discussed the Jehovah Witnesses desire not to celebrate any holiday ("Christian" or national). I completely understood the pagan roots and man's bastardizations of Christmas, Easter, etc. However, today I asked about Birthdays.
I was told that a birthday is surrounded by pagan symbols (i.e. the cake and candles). And this is true: http://www.tokenz.com/history-of-birthday-cake.html
Of course, "Witness children are not deprived of things," Bonnie claimed. I can't imagine that they would be. I truly believe that children today have too much "stuff". I am often sickened at the amount of "stuff" that is given to a child at Christmas or their Birthday. As an adult (and the parent of two small children), I really don't think a celebration should ALWAYS include gifts, even though the wise men (kings, etc.) brought gifts to Jesus. Witness children have multiple "parties" and "celebrations" throughout the year, but they don't have a special day that is "all about them." The parties include gifts for all the children. Focusing on one child takes away from Jehovah, according to them. It makes sense, but I did state that celebrating a child doesn't seem pagan to me. Celebrating them as a "child of God" once a year is important - not the gift part, just the love for the child. I think I'll ask about Baptismal celebrations. I would imagine that uplifting a child each year in celebration of their baptism would also be a "no-no". Hmph.
We also spoke about the "end times". Why? Well, because a Bible-based faith often focuses on the end...rather than the teachings. The Witnesses believe that 1914 was the start of the devils reign on Earth. That there was always bad things, but that was the point where a "shift of change" happened. World War I was a huge part of this. I do believe there is corruption in the world, but I still am having a hard time grasping that it is worse now than when the Inquisition was taking place...or when the Native Americans were being killed for the "white man" to acquire land...etc.
Anyway - we jumped around the Bible a bit. But I wanted to share the part that touched me. It is about when the disciples asked Jesus when the end of the age would be. Here is the version from the Message - Jesus is speaking, answering his disciples.
Matthew 24:32
Take a lesson from the fig tree. From the moment you notice its buds form, the merest hint of green, you know summer's just around the corner. So it is with you: When you see all these things, you know he's at the door. Don't take this lightly. I'm not just saying this for some future generation, but for all of you. This age continues until all these things take place. Sky and earth will wear out; my words won't wear out. But the exact day and hour? No one knows that, not even the heaven's angels, not even the Son. Only the Father knows.
The Witnesses believe that in 1914 (which is a number derived from a variety of Bible verses and simple math), the "generation" began. These people would be in their 90s now, so we are coming to "the end". The verse that implies "these things," is speaking about a variety of horrible things that happen to the Earth. But there will also be those that will share the message, which the Witness attribute to themselves. Here is the verses from the Message - Jesus is speaking:
Matthew 24:13
Staying with it - that's what God requires. Stay with it to the end. You won't be sorry, and you'll be saved. All during this time, the good news - the Message of the kingdom - will be preached all over the world, a witness staked out in every country. And then the end will come.
So there ya have it - my latest visit with my new friend, Bonnie. Hope this kept your interest...
After almost two weeks of added questions and research, Bonnie returned as promised.
At our last meeting we had discussed the Jehovah Witnesses desire not to celebrate any holiday ("Christian" or national). I completely understood the pagan roots and man's bastardizations of Christmas, Easter, etc. However, today I asked about Birthdays.
I was told that a birthday is surrounded by pagan symbols (i.e. the cake and candles). And this is true: http://www.tokenz.com/hist
Of course, "Witness children are not deprived of things," Bonnie claimed. I can't imagine that they would be. I truly believe that children today have too much "stuff". I am often sickened at the amount of "stuff" that is given to a child at Christmas or their Birthday. As an adult (and the parent of two small children), I really don't think a celebration should ALWAYS include gifts, even though the wise men (kings, etc.) brought gifts to Jesus. Witness children have multiple "parties" and "celebrations" throughout the year, but they don't have a special day that is "all about them." The parties include gifts for all the children. Focusing on one child takes away from Jehovah, according to them. It makes sense, but I did state that celebrating a child doesn't seem pagan to me. Celebrating them as a "child of God" once a year is important - not the gift part, just the love for the child. I think I'll ask about Baptismal celebrations. I would imagine that uplifting a child each year in celebration of their baptism would also be a "no-no". Hmph.
We also spoke about the "end times". Why? Well, because a Bible-based faith often focuses on the end...rather than the teachings. The Witnesses believe that 1914 was the start of the devils reign on Earth. That there was always bad things, but that was the point where a "shift of change" happened. World War I was a huge part of this. I do believe there is corruption in the world, but I still am having a hard time grasping that it is worse now than when the Inquisition was taking place...or when the Native Americans were being killed for the "white man" to acquire land...etc.
Anyway - we jumped around the Bible a bit. But I wanted to share the part that touched me. It is about when the disciples asked Jesus when the end of the age would be. Here is the version from the Message - Jesus is speaking, answering his disciples.
Matthew 24:32
Take a lesson from the fig tree. From the moment you notice its buds form, the merest hint of green, you know summer's just around the corner. So it is with you: When you see all these things, you know he's at the door. Don't take this lightly. I'm not just saying this for some future generation, but for all of you. This age continues until all these things take place. Sky and earth will wear out; my words won't wear out. But the exact day and hour? No one knows that, not even the heaven's angels, not even the Son. Only the Father knows.
The Witnesses believe that in 1914 (which is a number derived from a variety of Bible verses and simple math), the "generation" began. These people would be in their 90s now, so we are coming to "the end". The verse that implies "these things," is speaking about a variety of horrible things that happen to the Earth. But there will also be those that will share the message, which the Witness attribute to themselves. Here is the verses from the Message - Jesus is speaking:
Matthew 24:13
Staying with it - that's what God requires. Stay with it to the end. You won't be sorry, and you'll be saved. All during this time, the good news - the Message of the kingdom - will be preached all over the world, a witness staked out in every country. And then the end will come.
So there ya have it - my latest visit with my new friend, Bonnie. Hope this kept your interest...
My relationship with Bonnie
Originally written July 17th.
A month ago two Jehova's Witnesses came to the door. They had a flier for the big annual convention in Toledo, OH. I told Jim I was disappointed that I didn't get my Watch Tower for the year. I rather enjoy the articles and the viewpoints, albeit different from my own.
Then 3 weeks ago another group came to my door with the Watch Tower. One of the two was Bonnie. She said she'd be back in a few weeks to talk about the Watch Tower. I said, "sure"!
I read through it - glanced more like it - and sure enough last Friday there was a knock at the door. Bonnie and another lady was there with a copy of "What Does the Bible Really Teach?" I had read about this book in the Watch Tower and I was curious what the Witnesses believed. After all, I am always looking for information - I'm an information junkie. I research things WAY TOO DEEP sometimes. So I was elated to get my copy.
I began skimming and had questions for her visit this morning. She truly is a Christian woman in every sense of the word. She is a kind, caring, and knowledgeable woman.
In my desire to become closer to God, I am finding our conversations extremely inspiring. She is so dedicated to her views. That is really admiring to me. And for every question that I asked (both women were extremely surprised at the level of depth I was interested in going), Bonnie had an answer.
Many of the views of the Jehovah Witnesses are plausible. After all, the early Catholic church did create a lot of the "traditions" we Christian's hold dear to our hearts (Christmas on the 25th, Easter Sunday, the Trinity, etc.). It's rather refreshing to hear a few of my questions having different answers than the ones that are beat in "your dear little heads" from birth.
We are discussing "the End Times" next Friday. Believe it or not, I'm looking forward to our next discussion group. Not because I feel that she will convince me or influence me to take on her faith (i.e. join a Jehovah Witness church), but because I'm starving for intellectual conversation. Staying at home with a 2 and 4 year old isn't the most stimulating conversation...
So I plan on continuing this note on a weekly basis, as I develop a friendship with Bonnie. I will post my questions and her responses. Plus I will even comment or write the Bible verses we discussed in depth. My favorite one from today was Proverbs 8:22. She said Jesus was saying this (my version is from "the Message) and would explain how Jesus was not God Almighty (Jehovah):
God sovereignly made me - the first, the basic-
before he did anything else
I was brought into being a long time ago,
well before Earth got its start.
I arrived on the scene before Ocean,
yes, even before Springs and Rivers and Lakes.
Before Mountains were sculpted and Hills took shape,
I was already there, newborn;
Long before God stretched out Earth's Horizons,
and tended to the minute details of Soil and Weather,
I was there.
A month ago two Jehova's Witnesses came to the door. They had a flier for the big annual convention in Toledo, OH. I told Jim I was disappointed that I didn't get my Watch Tower for the year. I rather enjoy the articles and the viewpoints, albeit different from my own.
Then 3 weeks ago another group came to my door with the Watch Tower. One of the two was Bonnie. She said she'd be back in a few weeks to talk about the Watch Tower. I said, "sure"!
I read through it - glanced more like it - and sure enough last Friday there was a knock at the door. Bonnie and another lady was there with a copy of "What Does the Bible Really Teach?" I had read about this book in the Watch Tower and I was curious what the Witnesses believed. After all, I am always looking for information - I'm an information junkie. I research things WAY TOO DEEP sometimes. So I was elated to get my copy.
I began skimming and had questions for her visit this morning. She truly is a Christian woman in every sense of the word. She is a kind, caring, and knowledgeable woman.
In my desire to become closer to God, I am finding our conversations extremely inspiring. She is so dedicated to her views. That is really admiring to me. And for every question that I asked (both women were extremely surprised at the level of depth I was interested in going), Bonnie had an answer.
Many of the views of the Jehovah Witnesses are plausible. After all, the early Catholic church did create a lot of the "traditions" we Christian's hold dear to our hearts (Christmas on the 25th, Easter Sunday, the Trinity, etc.). It's rather refreshing to hear a few of my questions having different answers than the ones that are beat in "your dear little heads" from birth.
We are discussing "the End Times" next Friday. Believe it or not, I'm looking forward to our next discussion group. Not because I feel that she will convince me or influence me to take on her faith (i.e. join a Jehovah Witness church), but because I'm starving for intellectual conversation. Staying at home with a 2 and 4 year old isn't the most stimulating conversation...
So I plan on continuing this note on a weekly basis, as I develop a friendship with Bonnie. I will post my questions and her responses. Plus I will even comment or write the Bible verses we discussed in depth. My favorite one from today was Proverbs 8:22. She said Jesus was saying this (my version is from "the Message) and would explain how Jesus was not God Almighty (Jehovah):
God sovereignly made me - the first, the basic-
before he did anything else
I was brought into being a long time ago,
well before Earth got its start.
I arrived on the scene before Ocean,
yes, even before Springs and Rivers and Lakes.
Before Mountains were sculpted and Hills took shape,
I was already there, newborn;
Long before God stretched out Earth's Horizons,
and tended to the minute details of Soil and Weather,
I was there.
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